6 June, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Easter weekend marks beginning of ‘Be afraid to wear your Kathmandu jacket in public’ season

DAN SCHMIDT

It’s easy to forget that Easter carries with it a deeper, important meaning for so many in our community. For our friends in marketing, it’s the time of year where they can rejoice in the chance to pretend that they came up with the phrases “hop into savings”. 

For our elderly relatives, it’s a chance to permanently break the spirit of children everywhere with the customary presentation of Easter eggs bought from Cheap As Chips.

For the rest of us, the passing of Easter marks the beginning of jacket weather, more specifically, an opportunity to finally wear that super-warm, down, puffer jacket.

The change in weather does, however, carry the inherent risk of embarrassment that comes with being photographed wearing your jacket in public and having the photograph shared on popular local Instagram account [redacted].

Just like running MAFS polls and pushing our shitty calendars, we are the only ones in this state holding them to account

Account curator and part-time manager of his father’s rapidly-diminishing portfolio, Sebastian Toffeewank explained his ongoing hatred for people in Kathmandu jackets.

[redacted] is about punching up, speaking truth to power and protecting the little guy from injustice. And part of that is making fun of people wearing Kathmandu jackets, in the same way we would post an endless stream of pictures of people parking slightly outside of the lines. We’re holding them to account.’

‘Just like running MAFS polls and pushing our shitty calendars, we are the only ones in this state holding them to account.’

When we asked who ‘them’ was, [redacted] blocked us, as is their wont.

in Life, News
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