28 May, 2023

This ALDI cookware is such a bargain you’ll almost forget about Australia’s history of systemic racism

TRENT BARTLETT

What a glorious year under the good graces of the ALDI gods it has been. Just when we thought 2020 could not get any better, those magnificent German bastards have gone ahead and over-ordered a range of French cast iron cookware.

And of course it’s a bargain! It’s such a bargain that it will nearly make you forget about Australian’s history of systemic racism.

Sure, we’ll admit it. We’ve devoted at least two stories a week on our website to ALDI’s Special Buys, and while you might think that we’re getting some sort of kickback for such shameless pandering, we’re not. In fact, stories about ALDI’s Special Buys are the only ones that you mongrels click on anymore.

I mean, we assume it’s the only thing you’ll click on. We haven’t really tried much else. We did almost publish an article about Australia’s treatment of asylum seekers back in 2018, but then we got a press release about how Coles were going to bring back the Pick ‘N’ Mix to their Tea Tree Plaza store so we ran with that.

But come on, they’re selling a Dutch Oven for just twenty bucks or something! ARE YOU FUCKING LISTENING TO US?!?

It is a massive saving! This particular Dutch Oven would usually sell for $369.00. That’s a saving of over 90 per cent. To put that into perspective, Indigenous Australians have accounted for around 35 per cent of all deaths in custody in Australia since 1991*.

What a bargain. If that doesn’t make you forget that 432 Indigenous Australians have died while in custody since 1991, then we’re just not sure what will.

*Despite only making up 3.3 per cent of Australia’s population.

Editor’s note: No, this is not only a South Australian story. And yes, this is something that we should have been paying more attention to for a long time. But if we don’t talk about this now, then when do we talk about it? Now is not the time to look on at another country’s situation and claim the moral high ground.

Related Posts

Crows fan still angry about Ian Perrie for some reason

4 April, 2019

4 April, 2019

Their forward line has been a constant source of contempt for Adelaide Crows fans since Tony Modra packed up his...

Yatala Vale resident tired of explaining it’s nowhere near the prison

14 February, 2020

14 February, 2020

A resident of Yatala Vale, a picturesque semi-rural suburb in Adelaide’s outer north-east, is fed up being asked if she...

Entire city somehow surprised by annual road closures again

26 February, 2019

26 February, 2019

Despite a predictable schedule of annual road closures preceded by road signs forewarning motorists weeks in advance, the entire population...

Ken Hinkley spotted scouting Tea Tree Gully over 35’s Masters team for better talent

2 April, 2022

2 April, 2022

After starting the season with three straight losses including a Showdown loss against a team who “can’t handball and can’t...

CBD co-workers from opposite sides of city pretend to know where each other live

5 October, 2018

5 October, 2018

As Harry North and Belinda Southeast sat down for lunch at their CBD workplace, conversation turned to the weekend and...

Adelaide Metro bus driver sets heater to a nice comfortable 48 degrees

2 July, 2020

2 July, 2020

As we enter the middle of a mild winter, Adelaide public transport operators are doing the best to ensure the...

Ridgehaven Hungry Jack’s bushes heritage listed

22 February, 2021

22 February, 2021

Finally joining the likes of South Australian icons such as Popeye and Wayne Weidemann’s Mullet, the row of street facing...

South Australians go into three-month, self-imposed lockdown following end of Fringe

21 March, 2021

21 March, 2021

TRENT BARTLETT Adelaideans have retreated into their annual, self-imposed lockdown for a quarter of the year following the end of...

SA tells WA ‘Only we have the skills to maintain problem-riddled subs’

13 August, 2019

13 August, 2019

With Western Australia circling Adelaide’s lucrative Collins Class Submarine maintenance contract, SA’s western counterparts have been told to ‘Back off,...

Zoran Matic, Damian Mori & Alex Tobin assemble crack team to lure Messi to Adelaide City

26 August, 2020

26 August, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT With Lionel Messi announcing his intention to leave Barcelona immediately, the world’s premiere football clubs have already thrown...

Richmond Road mural fined for deceptive and confusing advertising of state

23 February, 2020

23 February, 2020

A Mile End South mural emblazoned with the boastful phrase “South Australia leads the world” has been punished for displaying...

4 hour parking limit very optimistic about people’s desire to spend their time at Colonnades

27 August, 2020

27 August, 2020

One of Adelaide’s southern suburbs shopping and smoking centres has come under scrutiny around its imposed parking limit times. Colonnades...

REVEALED: Seven Stars Hotel actually only has 4.3 star Google rating

7 November, 2019

7 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South Australia, today...

Port Elliot millennials start petition to change name of Boomer Beach

22 November, 2019

22 November, 2019

Undertaking the ultimate form of slacktivism, Port Elliot’s entire millennial population (a total of sixteen residents) have started an online...

Has COVID finally gone too far? Now The Planet nightclub is being demolished

27 October, 2020

27 October, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT The COVID-19 pandemic has taken more than its fair share of scalps in South Australia. The West End...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: