14 April, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

“My family is from Dublin too!” says man in desperate pickup attempt

DAN SCHMIDT

With Saint Patrick’s Day festivities well underway in Australia, everyone with even the smallest amount of Irish heritage is pretending to like Guinness and The Cranberries, even though Harpers and B*Witched are clearly superior.

However, it seems one local man from the Adelaide Plains region may be taking this to the extreme.

In an attempt to woo a grape-picking backpacker/roadworks sign person/Glenelg barkeep, or whatever it is that young Irish people are doing here these days, Murphy Dropkik is attempting to falsely claiming Celtic lineage purely based on the fact his father grew up just off Port Wakefield Road.

‘Yeah, my family is from Dublin’, Murphy muttered to no response ‘Do you know the P.J. O’Brien’s?…No. Uhhh, let’s see, what else? Ah, I used to have a Dell laptop back in 2009. No? Okay…Oh I know, I’m terrible at managing my finances! How about that?’

Unfortunately, Murphy’s attempts went unnoticed and he was forced to move on as his prospective partner turned the sign to ‘SLOW’.

Related Posts

Daniel Andrews to become new face of Victoria Bitter

19 June, 2020

19 June, 2020

A HARD EARNED THIRST FOR WHAT SA HAS: “Why would you want to go there?” remarked Victorian Premier Andrews earlier...

Guy who loved Casino’s Loco Bar drink stock market now heaps into crypto

27 January, 2022

27 January, 2022

HODL THE LIME: In the early 2000’s when the Adelaide Casino first figured out the fact that they could further...

Aspiring Magic Cave Father Christmas will probably settle for Parabanks gig again

26 October, 2018

26 October, 2018

For professional shopping centre Father Christmas Claude St Velcro, it’s become a case of take what you can get. Every...

Fresh from Vegas warm-up show, U2 set to perform out the front of that Rundle Lantern thing

2 October, 2023

2 October, 2023

TRENT BARTLETT Following on from a Las Vegas warm-up show, Irish “rockers” U2 have landed in Adelaide for their showpiece...

Moana commuter really appreciates that 20m stretch of Fiveash Dr with the 70kmh speed limit

30 June, 2020

30 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT A Moana resident who commutes to Adelaide’s eastern suburbs every day for work, has once again sent his...

New “DogKeeper” package grants people $10,000 in Dogs Dollars for rent or Smirnoff Double Blacks

27 July, 2020

27 July, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT As South Australia grapples with the ongoing economic impact of COVID-19, the Federal Government has moved to stimulate...

Locals outraged as Tea Tree Plaza attempt to charge drivers for burnouts

19 October, 2022

19 October, 2022

Modbury’s fourth best shopping centre is in the middle of a battle with the governing bodies in an attempt to...

Office worker finds any excuse to tell you that she did City To Bay

16 September, 2019

16 September, 2019

You don’t typically see Sarah from marketing at the office before 9am at best. And to see her away from...

Outrage as advertising projected on to Adelaide’s most famous cultural landmark

9 October, 2018

9 October, 2018

The iconic brick façade of Adelaide’s West End Brewery will be used to advertise a party supplies shop after SA premier Stephen...

Local man optimistic 45th Bertie Beetle of the week will somehow taste better than the previous 44

16 September, 2025

16 September, 2025

In a bold display of misplaced hope and digestive resilience, local man Cole O’Pteran has declared that his 45th Bertie...

Historians confirm Ice Arena’s hire skates date back to Huronian ice age, still awaiting their first sharpening

17 October, 2025

17 October, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT Carbon dating has revealed that the hire skates available at Thebarton’s Ice Arena skating rink date back to...

Man finds great joy in not letting car cut in Main North Rd & Fitzroy Tce right turn lane

30 January, 2023

30 January, 2023

Manningham resident, Moe Trist, has reportedly once again taken delight in the only thing that makes his morning commute tolerable....

Adelaide Crows reveal new Showdown guernsey

9 April, 2021

9 April, 2021

With the next Showdown announced to take place in round 8, the Adelaide Crows have revealed a new strip that...

Adelaide Mail’s top 10 Adelaide 36ers of all time

6 May, 2020

6 May, 2020

Here we are again, another list. We’re just as happy about it as you, okay? Nobody wants to read lists...

To avoid confusion Walkleys / Sudholz / Darley / Newton / Penfold / St Bernards Road to get even more names

14 January, 2020

14 January, 2020

MATT FREEMAN Adelaide’s single stretch of road with more names than any other, Walkleys / Sudholz / Darley / Newton...

Comments

Leave a Reply

Discover more from Adelaide Mail

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading