15 April, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Man goes to Glenelg for New Year’s under impression it may be good

A local Adelaide man will tonight undertake what many South Australians have fallen trap to in the past.

As a right of passage for many young families, third-wheelers, and teenage flogs, spending New Year’s Eve at The Bay is something most people undertake only once in their lifetime, and for good reason. However tonight, Christopher Peabody feels that Glenelg will be the place to be.

‘First of all, it’s really easy to get to’, stated Christopher ‘from my house all I need to do is get a taxi to the nearest bus stop, the bus to the interchange, then change bus, take that bus to the City, get off the bus, walk to the tram stop, line up for the tram, get on the tram, then get off the tram because it was going the wrong way, then walk back to the tram stop, line up again, get on the right tram, then just take the quick 40 minute tram ride to Glenelg. Easy. I figure if I leave by morning I should get there for the 9:30 fireworks’.

I’m sure there won’t be any dickhead teenagers looking for trouble about

The ease of commute is not the only thing enticing Christopher to The Bay this year, he also told Adelaide Mail he was very excited about the entertainment ‘Well it’s safe to assume there will be some sort of generic cover band that I could see at my local pub any night of the week, plus there may even be a washed up DJ or band from the early 2000’s if I’m lucky’*.

‘But above all that’, Christopher continued ‘it’s just the vibe of the place, good to just relax and have a few bevvies. Yeah, I know it’s a dry zone, but there’s plenty of pubs around that probably won’t be full from 6 pm. And look, even if I don’t get in anywhere, hanging around in the streets and park is fun too, I’m sure there won’t be any dickhead teenagers looking for trouble about’.

The overly optimistic man continued as our reporters were trying to hold their laughter,  ‘Plus, it’s got the best fireworks in Adelaide. But if I want to beat the leaving crowds and get home before 4 am I’ll have to leave by 11:30. But I figure if I’m having a good night and bump into some mates, I’ll watch the fireworks and stick around until the crowds die down. Hopefully then I’ll get home by February’.

*Editor’s note: After writing this I checked who was playing at The Bay, it’s Regurgitator. I don’t mind them actually, so I guess I’ll see you all down at Glenelg tonight.

in Life, News
Related Posts

Crows family members plead for exemption to leave South Australia after sons’ 2020 season

25 September, 2020

25 September, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT Following the decision by health authorities to allow Port Power family members into SA on a special exemption...

Rail shutdown somehow leads to more punctual tram and train services

21 August, 2019

21 August, 2019

With commuter rail services shut down over two days in order to let transport workers attend mandatory meetings, Adelaide commuters...

Man leverages home equity to pay for son’s frog cake addiction

2 February, 2019

2 February, 2019

Being a single parent is never easy financially, especially when you have a ten-year-old son eating upwards of three Balfours...

Regional dad wears Akubra at Adelaide Airport just to flex on these city slickers

23 October, 2019

23 October, 2019

Nothing gives Bruce Jolliswagmen greater joy than getting to showcase how he comes from a regional area in the form of...

This ALDI cookware is such a bargain you’ll almost forget about Australia’s history of systemic racism

2 June, 2020

2 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT What a glorious year under the good graces of the ALDI gods it has been. Just when we...

Ridgehaven Hungry Jack’s bushes heritage listed

22 February, 2021

22 February, 2021

Finally joining the likes of South Australian icons such as Popeye and Wayne Weidemann’s Mullet, the row of street facing...

Old mate looking for roast buffet ends up at new CBD hospital

30 January, 2020

30 January, 2020

An event that can only be described as “not newsworthy at all” (even for Adelaide Mail standards) occured in the...

Nuff: We interviewed this garden gnome wearing a POWER shirt and he couldn’t even name their captain

5 February, 2020

5 February, 2020

Somewhere in the backstreets of Glanville sits a cocky garden gnome claiming allegiance to the POWER. Within a manicured low-maintenance...

Power fan really hopes those photos from 1993 never resurface

16 October, 2020

16 October, 2020

1993, it was a simpler time. No social media, you could still smoke on public transport (well you weren’t meant...

AFP raids Adelaide Mail offices only to find Xavier Minniecon

5 June, 2019

5 June, 2019

One year after publishing a damning exposé on the existence of the fictional suburb Kingswood, Australian Federal Police officers have...

Victor Harbor opens new Youth Centre for local adolescents aged 55-70

9 July, 2018

9 July, 2018

In an attempt at engaging the region’s younger demographic, Victor Harbor has launched a hip new hangout for residents born...

Suburb of Paradise hit with false claims lawsuit

15 January, 2019

15 January, 2019

The north-eastern suburb of Paradise has found itself in legal trouble with a class action lawsuit being filed by thousands...

No media bias: For every negative Power article, we run at least 0.2 negative Crows articles

9 June, 2020

9 June, 2020

SHOWDOWN WEEK: It’s often stated that there is a media bias in South Australia when it comes to our AFL...

Guns N’ Roses actually pretty disappointed with Paradise city

24 July, 2019

24 July, 2019

During last year’s world tour, 80’s rock band Guns N’ Roses finally managed to make it to their ultimate destination,...

If they have to tear the Big Scotsman down, at least let us finally see his dick

14 April, 2021

14 April, 2021

For generations passing motorists and those unfortunate enough to stay at Scotty’s Motel have tried to catch a glimpse at...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: