22 October, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Prison Bar design actually based on smiles of Port Adelaide fans

DAN SCHMIDT

As the battle between Port Adelaide and Collingwood around who owns vertical monochrome stripes continues, football historians have discovered that the design of the Port Adelaide Prison Bar guernsey is not actually based upon the Port Adelaide wharf pylons, as initially suspected.

Adelaide Mail spoke with Port Adelaide local historian, Al Burton, who stated ‘Well, everyone knows we have a proud history of wearing the black and white stripes, which we actually started doing a decade after Collingwood, but what many don’t know is that it’s not actually based on the wharf pylons of the Port’.

‘It all started once Port Adelaide won a close game in one of their four other previous gurneseys we don’t really talk about. After the game, the crowd was full of smiles and THAT’S where the uniform designer got the idea’.

Since then, the Prison Bar design has become synonymous with the football club, even recently released on beer packaging owned by an international brewing conglomerate. However, Eddie McGuire remains unconvinced.

‘Look’, said the rich flog, ‘we’ve been the magpies wearing the black and white stripes long before Port Adelaide, and it’s pretty clear that no fan base has fewer teeth than Collingwood’.

For once, we actually agree with him.

As the prison bar debate continues, one thing remains certain, which is ‘You Adelaide Mail tossers are just salty your shit wooden spoon franchise that you love flogging off didn’t make the finals’.

Once again, correct.

in News, Sport
Related Posts

(BOT ARTICLE) O-Bahn takes Caleb Bond to Chidda for Iced Coffee drink

14 December, 2020

14 December, 2020

NOTE: It’s the end of the year and we’re running out of ideas. So we decided to put every Adelaide...

Lost child at WOMADelaide probably better off to be honest

6 March, 2020

6 March, 2020

As South Australia’s leading world-music and body-odour festival goes on this weekend, a six year old child has been found...

Burnside SUV driver will definitely only be five minutes in the loading zone

20 July, 2018

20 July, 2018

Burnside stay-at-home daughter Jacinta Hyacinth was caught short this morning on her usual coffee meet with the girls at trendy...

Local wheelie bin maintains and confirms SAFM still rocks Banksia Park

21 June, 2021

21 June, 2021 1

Decades after the heyday of the SAFM Black Thunders gracing suburban Adelaide streets handing out icy-cold cans of expired cola,...

Next season of ‘Bachelor in Paradise’ to actually be set in Adelaide’s premier suburb of Paradise

24 August, 2018

24 August, 2018

Due to excessive helicopter use and a vast majority of the budget being spent on Osher’s hair, Channel 10 executives have...

Adelaide Metro app update to feature better arrival time accuracy of non-existent buses

12 November, 2018

12 November, 2018

In the largest app update since the ‘randomly crashing’ feature Adelaide Metro has announced the newest app feature for commuters....

Vincent Rinaldo very disappointed by this so called ‘Fringe’ Festival

22 February, 2019

22 February, 2019

One of Adelaide’s leading hair and fashion icons, Vincent Rinaldo, has left a scathing review the opening week of the...

Turns out Christies Beach sludge spill just rejected Caleb Bond articles

13 November, 2018

13 November, 2018

A break-in at the Christies Beach sewage treatment plant has seen the nearby beach closed for a stretch of 200...

“Never doubted ‘em” says Crows fan who chopped up membership after his seats were moved for 2021

20 March, 2021

20 March, 2021

TRENT BARTLETT Former Adelaide Football Club member Jesper Cantankeron maintains that his faith in his footy club never wavered, despite...

Satirical news site runs out of TV commercials to rank, now completely out of ideas

29 May, 2020

29 May, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT South Australia’s second favourite source of fake news has been revealed for the sham that it is, with...

Calm down Jessica, it’s Lofty, not Everest

21 December, 2018

21 December, 2018

With a backpack full of rations, emergency supplies, and flares, Jessica Peak is fully equipped for her 3.9km Waterfall Gully to Mount...

South Australian corrects interstate friend on her pronunciation again

19 February, 2019

19 February, 2019

In what is fast becoming a deal-breaker amongst new Victorian friends and colleagues of South Australian Shelly Fischer, the freshly-migrated...

Humphrey B Bear says cancel culture has killed opportunities for mute, pantsless bears on TV

22 March, 2021

22 March, 2021

TRENT BARTLETT Australia’s most famous boater hat-wearing anthropomorphic bear has broken his decades-long silence to add to the chorus of...

New “Farmers Onion” Iced Coffee flavour only popular with one man

29 October, 2019

29 October, 2019

In a bold new move by South Australia’s highest selling beverage company, the new Farmer’s Union, “Farmer’s Onion” Iced Coffee...

This ALDI cookware is such a bargain you’ll almost forget about Australia’s history of systemic racism

2 June, 2020

2 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT What a glorious year under the good graces of the ALDI gods it has been. Just when we...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: