9 May, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

AFL “Magic Round” just Ian Perrie sawing Wayne Weidemann in half

DAN SCHMIDT

With the first AFL “Magic Round” to be held in Adelaide in 2023, excitement and speculation has begun in regards to what this will entail. However, it has been uncovered that the proposed schedule may temper (or perhaps exceed) fan expectations.

In an announcement by AFL officials today along some of the seedier banks of the Torrens, Adelaide Mail reporters (who just happened to be there for a completely different but very legal reason) overheard that the main drawcard of the AFL Magic Round will be former Adelaide Crows “star” Ian Perrie sawing a random crowd member (who just happens to also be Wayne Weidemann, another ex-Crow) in half.

Ian Perrie entered the press conference in a puff of smoke and hired tuxedo to the Europe hit “The Final Countdown”.

As a teaser to what the Magic Round could also include, Ian Perrie asked if any of the reporters in the crowd had a 20 cent coin and a cigarette. From there he stated he would attempt the illusion of putting the cigarette through the coin.

Ian “The Great Sarge” Perrie then proceeded to put on a solitary magicians glove and take an extremely long time to line up the cigarette with the coin. As the crowd hushed, Ian then somehow missed the coin completely from directly infront.

He then proceeded to just pocket the coin and cigarette before disappearing in a puff of smoke, but we could still just see him running off as it cleared.

The conference then concluded with the announcement of some other illusions that will make up AFL Magic Round including Tony Modra pulling a bird out of a hat and also several more at The Alma, David Koch bending some bars using only his mental gymnastics, and an Adelaide Crows fan claiming loudly that they are holding a ball in their hand even though they are clearly not.

in News, Sport
Related Posts

North East Road to be 100% service stations by 2026

9 January, 2020

9 January, 2020 1

With the rise in popularity of X Convenience service stations and OTR’s “they build one, we build two” policy, urban planning experts have revealed that this exponential growth will lead to North East Road becoming entirely lined with service stations by mid-2026.

Christmas Pageant updated to take faster, more efficient route

5 November, 2025

5 November, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT Adelaide’s Christmas Pageant has been updated to take a more efficient, faster route which will take it out...

REVEALED: Infrastructure plans to ease traffic on South Eastern Freeway

6 October, 2021

6 October, 2021

With South Eastern Freeway Traffic continually becoming worse, we at the Adelaide Mail have taken it upon ourselves to solve...

Windy Point actually pronounced “Wine-dee” point because of the winding route to get there

15 November, 2019

15 November, 2019

Windy Point – You’re all saying it wrong! It turns out that we’ve all been saying the name of Adelaide’s...

Liberals clarify public transport proposal: “No, no we want to SELL our trains and trams for 50c”

22 September, 2025

22 September, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT The South Australian Liberal party has clarified what they meant by their ’50 cent public transport’ proposal that...

Victorians stowed away on train raise suspicion when they try to get off at Chidda

15 July, 2020

15 July, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT Four Victorians have raised the suspicions of fellow passengers when they attempted to alight at the mythical Chidda...

Frequent Marion shopper develops sophisticated algorithm to avoid charity workers

28 May, 2018

28 May, 2018

Rosaline Baker, 56, of Warradale enjoys nothing more than a good shopping spree at nearby Westfield Marion. It’s local, convenient...

Lost child at WOMADelaide probably better off to be honest

6 March, 2020

6 March, 2020

As South Australia’s leading world-music and body-odour festival goes on this weekend, a six year old child has been found...

Fun Fact: TTP actually stands for ‘That Terrible Place’

21 August, 2020

21 August, 2020

“WhY iS tHe rEtAiL sEcToR fAiLiNg?”: It is a little known fact that the north-eastern shopping centre was initially named...

Adelaide Mail’s top 10 Adelaide 36ers of all time

6 May, 2020

6 May, 2020

Here we are again, another list. We’re just as happy about it as you, okay? Nobody wants to read lists...

Sydney mate won’t shut up about the size of our pint glasses

31 January, 2019

31 January, 2019

In an act of mental gymnastics usually only displayed by whoever our current Prime Minister is, our mate Dan from...

City resident can’t go twenty minutes without telling someone they live in the CBD

15 October, 2018

15 October, 2018

Even after months after moving into her new South Terrace apartment, Ebony Higgs of Adelaide, continues to remind everyone of...

Modbury High graduate furious at suggestion she went to Modbury Heights

15 April, 2019

15 April, 2019

It’s been over 15 years since Kelly S. Farm graduated high school to pursue a sticky-tape tester apprenticeship, but there...

Hindley Street to become 100% shisha bars by 2020, study reveals

17 January, 2019

17 January, 2019

New research into economic trends in Adelaide’s west end reveals that the city’s most famous nightstrip is heading towards wall-to-wall...

SA girl Cassie Sainsbury reportedly excited for upcoming “White Wedding”

19 November, 2021

19 November, 2021

TOM STEWART With news breaking yesterday that local girl Cassandra Sainsbury is engaged, it is reported she is now looking...

Comments

Leave a Reply

Discover more from Adelaide Mail

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading