24 September, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

People somehow shocked when Liberal govt starts privatising everything

With the state government looking for novel and opportunistic ways to deliver on pre-election fiscal promises, several key pieces of South Australian infrastructure are set to be privatised in the coming weeks.

After signalling that the state government would seek to privatise the service of Adelaide’s trams and trains, Premier Steven Marshall has become emboldened, and set off on a good old-fashioned Liberal party privatisation romp.

Premier Marshall has already started talking about privatising the Privatisation Commission

Making its way on to the potential sell list are state government assets: the Central Market, the entire fleet of Country Fire Service trucks, Mobilong Prison’s bakery unit and State Treasurer the Honourable Rob Lucas.

But it’s not just state-owned assets that are up for auction. The Premier has also sought advice on the sale of Penfolds Winery, the back catalogue of Adelaide-shot Wheel of Fortune episodes with Baby John Burgess, Phil Smyth and the music of Groove Terminator.

With the heady task of finding buyers for the litany of assets, a new Privatisation Commission has been set up. Although Premier Marshall has already started talking about privatising the Privatisation Commission.

Potential suitors for the commission are being identified by the newly-established Privatisation of the Privatisation Commission Commission, which is, in itself, in the process of being privatised by the state government.

Related Posts

Subscribe to Adelaide Mail for a free set of headphones

25 June, 2019

25 June, 2019

With the state’s largest satirical newspaper, The Advertiser, currently attempting to lure the fellow kids into subscribing to their state...

Dad unnecessarily angry about how safe St. Kilda Playground is these days

11 June, 2020

11 June, 2020

Tired of enclosed trampolines, anti-bullying campaigns and gluten intolerances, distant father of six Darren Dedbeit decided to take the kids...

Remaining KI koalas go missing as news of PM’s visit spreads

8 January, 2020

8 January, 2020

As news of the Prime Minister’s visit to Kangaroo Island spreads amongst what remains of Kangaroo Island’s koala community, the...

Limited edition Womenz FruChocs released for International Women’s Day

5 March, 2020

5 March, 2020

MATT FREEMAN Menz Confectionery have released a special limited edition run of their much beloved FruChocs for International Women’s Day...

AdBlocker removes entire AdelaideNow website

22 July, 2019

22 July, 2019

As Gavin Alook was searching for an old news article about the time his school actually figured out what the...

Stupid Klemzig resident gets on express bus again

1 October, 2019

1 October, 2019

For the fourth time in as many weeks, Branden Burg of Klemzig has once again managed to find himself on...

Steven Marshall reinvents himself with some snazzy new sneakers

9 January, 2019

9 January, 2019

Never one to shrink from the opportunity to imitate one of his federal government counterparts, South Australian Premier Steven Marshall...

Local livestreamed gigs to be replaced with livestreamed pokie rooms

8 April, 2020

8 April, 2020

With the coronavirus shutting down the city’s remaining live music venues, bands have begun turning to the internet to live...

MP Jon Gee caught pwning CS:GO noobs in parliament

1 August, 2019

1 August, 2019

Just a few days after being busted playing Solitaire during budget estimates, it seems the brazen member for Taylor, MP Jon...

Ceduna resident extremely angry about Adelaide Park Lands development

9 April, 2019

9 April, 2019

Murat Thevenard of Ceduna is your average consumer of South Australia’s satirical newspaper, The Advertiser, he gets it delivered to...

Next season of ‘Bachelor in Paradise’ to actually be set in Adelaide’s premier suburb of Paradise

24 August, 2018

24 August, 2018

Due to excessive helicopter use and a vast majority of the budget being spent on Osher’s hair, Channel 10 executives have...

Chairman Mao’s portrait to be replaced with image of Pasquale Mastrangelo

16 August, 2018

16 August, 2018

The famous gates of Beijing’s Forbidden City are about to receive a real estate agent-inspired makeover, courtesy of Adelaide commercial...

Desperate $5 Fringe show now accepting AfterPay

13 March, 2019

13 March, 2019

Photo credit: Abi Skipp Following several weeks of lower-than-expected ticket sales, the Garden of Unearthly Delights’ cheapest ticketed show — The...

BMW X5s return to Burnside after annual migration to Pt Elliot shacks

4 January, 2019

4 January, 2019

An annual migratory flight of eastern suburbs quasi-four wheel drives is nearly over for another year as the final straggling...

Pray for Kane: Cornes forced to scrap next six months of story ideas

4 September, 2019

4 September, 2019

Kane Cornes’s media career has been thrown into disarray after Adelaide Crows co-captain Taylor Walker announced that he will be...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: