29 September, 2022

To rival Power’s 3 Game Membership, Crows offer 3 Quarter Membership

DAN SCHMIDT

With Port Adelaide Power Football Club (est. 1997) claiming they now have the most members of any AFL club, yet somehow still can’t fill a home game to more than 65% capacity, the Adelaide Crows are now also looking at sneaky ways to build membership numbers.

Adelaide Football Club’s manager of pseudo memberships and knitted seat cushions, Cam Rickrowe stated to the Adelaide Mail ‘The Port Power have really upped their numbers in the past few years by introducing Pet Memberships, Baby Memberships and 3 game memberships*, but we feel we’ve got something that is really going to appeal to Crows fans. The 3 Quarter Membership’.

‘Yes, that’s right. With this new flexible membership option, fans can attend each and every home game for the first three quarters of the match. It’s perfect for a lot of our fans who do this already. It’s also great for those who just can’t be bothered watching us lose, those who want to beat the traffic, or like many of our fans, just need to get back to the aged care facility before their five o’clock dinner is served’.

The 3 Quarter Membership will be introduced from 2021, along with the new Junior Membership Package, for which any Crows fan under the age of 50 is eligible.

*Yes, we know Adelaide offer 3 Game Memberships also, so don’t bother telling us please. However, we don’t believe Crom can beat this outstanding membership deal:

Related Posts

Fringe ends, Arj Barker once again cryogenically frozen for 11 months

23 March, 2022

23 March, 2022

After another successful Adelaide Fringe Festival for our FIFO comedians, many ore once again returning to their cryogenic freezers until...

Noel’s Caravans jingle tops SA reggae charts for 728th consecutive week

19 October, 2018

19 October, 2018

For over a decade the laid back calypso beats and offbeat feeling of the Noel’s Caravans jingle has been so...

Power fans start pretending they always follow SANFL

20 September, 2019

20 September, 2019

With the Port Adelaide Magpies facing off against Glenelg in the SANFL Grand Final this weekend, Port Power fans will...

Woman updates LinkedIn profile to include climbing Big Rocking Horse certificate

23 January, 2019

23 January, 2019

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Melanie Yearling of Birdwood doing whatever she can to enhance her LinkedIn profile for...

Port Elliot millennials start petition to change name of Boomer Beach

22 November, 2019

22 November, 2019

Undertaking the ultimate form of slacktivism, Port Elliot’s entire millennial population (a total of sixteen residents) have started an online...

14 year old comedic genius invents the nickname “Colon Aids”

19 March, 2020

19 March, 2020

A Hackham West teenager has taken Adelaide’s southern suburbs by storm after creating a hilarious crude nickname for Colonnades shopping...

Neo-nazis get wires crossed, end up at St Kilda Adventure Playground

6 January, 2019

6 January, 2019

When Salisbury’s resident neo-nazis Morgan Dolkhatch and Barry “Knuckles” Mudflap found out about an upcoming rally of right wing extremists...

P-Plater fined for NOT doing burnout at Golden Grove Hungry Jack’s Drive-Thru

25 February, 2021

25 February, 2021

The day after a man has been arrested for doing a burnout at a southern suburbs Hungry Jack’s, another similar...

Premier Pete gets right onto fixing the ramping issues

22 March, 2022

22 March, 2022

South Australia’s new Premier has wasted absolutely no time acting upon his promise of fixing the ramping issues. However, it...

“Ignore all the references to northern NSW, “Flame Trees” is definitely about Elizabeth”

26 November, 2020

26 November, 2020

Ask any true-blue northern suburbs local about Aussie rock and they’ll tell you a thing or two about a thing...

Steven Marshall reinvents himself with some snazzy new sneakers

9 January, 2019

9 January, 2019

Never one to shrink from the opportunity to imitate one of his federal government counterparts, South Australian Premier Steven Marshall...

Government shocked when video of weeping man doesn’t encourage tourists to flock to SA

22 January, 2020

22 January, 2020

A baffling marketing campaign featuring an elderly man weeping as he toured throughout South Australia’s tourism hot spots has been...

Magic Cave now just a ‘Magic 3 x 4 metre room’

19 November, 2018

19 November, 2018

Budget cuts and declining sponsors have hit the Magic Cave hard this year, with Santa and his entire grotto allocated...

REVEALED: Chicken Chef actually only qualified as a Kitchenhand

4 November, 2019

4 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: