22 October, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Colour blind uni student argues superiority of green and white cafe

A colour blind University of Adelaide arts student has found himself in an overly heated argument about the relative virtues of two rival North Adelaide chip shops.

Viktor Dichromat has been a long-time customer of one of O’Connell Street’s two otherwise indistinguishable colour-themed cafes. We’re not sure which one he likes, however, his passionate defence of his choice between the two does come across as borderline manic.

Those idiots who go to that other Green and White Cafe down the road have no taste. Green and white is where it’s at

‘Green and white is the shit’, says Dichromat, in between asking his girlfriend to confirm the colour of the jumper he’s chosen to wear for the day.

‘They literally invented the AB, those idiots who go to that other Green and White Cafe down the road have no taste. Green and white is where it’s at’.

Having grown incensed at the idea that nobody was willing to argue with him about the better of the two chip shops, Dichromat then started successive arguments over why everybody refers to those ‘white’ traffic lights as ‘green’ and how this ‘orange’ fruit that people talk about does not actually exist.

Related Posts

Annoying ‘Yip Yip, Uh-huh Uh-huh’ Martian costumes also stolen, nobody cares

22 April, 2021

22 April, 2021

With the return of the Big Bird costume stolen from the Sesame Street Circus Spectacular in Bonython Park, it has...

North East Road to be 100% service stations by 2026

9 January, 2020

9 January, 2020 1

With the rise in popularity of X Convenience service stations and OTR’s “they build one, we build two” policy, urban planning experts have revealed that this exponential growth will lead to North East Road becoming entirely lined with service stations by mid-2026.

Torrens NYE “just as good as Darling Harbour” says cash-strapped dad

30 December, 2018

30 December, 2018

Following intensive rallying by his two sons calling for a new year’s eve trip to Sydney, Walton Erudite has made...

We rank Adelaide’s best TikTok stars

29 June, 2021

29 June, 2021

Whether they’re annoying shoppers while filming cringey shit in Rundle Mall or thinking their videos actually get that many views,...

Regional dad hopes this Africola place does a good schnitty

22 November, 2018

22 November, 2018

Visiting his graduating son in ‘the big smoke’, Bill Wrangler of Renmark decided to take the family out for a...

Crows list manager convinced Ashton Kutcher is behind news of player requesting trade TO the Crows

6 October, 2020

6 October, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT In genuinely unprecedented news, an AFL player has made public his desire to move to the Adelaide Football...

Port Power to continue playing to empty stadiums amid crowd ban

11 March, 2020

11 March, 2020

TOM STEWART Port Power are reportedly excited for “business as usual” this season, as the AFL is speculated to announce...

Car controlled by bees still more courteous than most Adelaide drivers

26 September, 2019

26 September, 2019

In a growing trend to worry drivers and parents across Adelaide, South Australian motorists are surrendering their cars to swarms...

(BOT ARTICLE) O-Bahn takes Caleb Bond to Chidda for Iced Coffee drink

14 December, 2020

14 December, 2020

NOTE: It’s the end of the year and we’re running out of ideas. So we decided to put every Adelaide...

Farmers Union to launch new milk-based sports energy drink

16 December, 2020

16 December, 2020

"The curdle helps you clear the hurdles"

Local livestreamed gigs to be replaced with livestreamed pokie rooms

8 April, 2020

8 April, 2020

With the coronavirus shutting down the city’s remaining live music venues, bands have begun turning to the internet to live...

Vegetarian laughed out of Hahndorf pub

22 August, 2018

22 August, 2018

After folding to her friends’ pressure, lifelong vegetarian Kate N. Speck agreed that she could ‘probably find something’ on the...

Campbelltown man installs sprinklers to water concrete while he’s on holiday

12 July, 2018

12 July, 2018

A Campbelltown man has installed a state-of-the-art, new sprinkler system to continue a strict routine of concrete watering over his...

Resident of Not In Service always has entire bus to himself

4 June, 2020

4 June, 2020

A resident of one of Adelaide’s lesser known inner-outer suburbs, Not In Service, has continued to regularly catch public transport...

Victor Harbor opens new Youth Centre for local adolescents aged 55-70

9 July, 2018

9 July, 2018

In an attempt at engaging the region’s younger demographic, Victor Harbor has launched a hip new hangout for residents born...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: