2 December, 2023

Mysterious Port Adelaide dome’s content revealed: It was Tim Noonan in there all along!

TRENT BARTLETT

The owners of the mysterious white dome that appeared in Port Adelaide (before being blown away in a gust of wind and then reappearing due to another, different gust of wind) have revealed exactly what it was hiding inside.

The evil-sounding, but in fact entirely benevolent Shadow Dominion Incorporated called a press conference, mainly to give us some fake quotes and pad out this article.

‘We knew that the authors of this article really had painted themselves into a corner with the headline’, said Dr Arlen Hargrave, CEO of the mysterious Shadow Dominion Incorporated.

‘The joke was in the headline, if you could even call it that. Really it seems like this publication’s idea of comedy is to take a current event in South Australia and then insert a reference to a previously high-profile regional celebrity.

‘It was either a former TV weatherman or a 90s Crows player,’ continued Dr Hargrave, who was completely off the scent, fyi.

The names we were actually tossing up were Xavier Minniecon, Rodney Jameson and former SAFM breakfast show host ‘Rabbit’ of ‘Rabbit & Amber’ fame. Still think we only talk about former weathermen and Crows players?!?

As an aside, check back at Adelaide Mail later in the week for our exclusive investigative piece: “Romano Negri to relaunch Keith Martyn’s almanac”

Stay up-to-date with what’s not happening in Adelaide, with the Adelaide Mail Podcast:

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