Elon Musk buys AdelaideFree Wifi for thirty bucks and a carton of West End

DAN SCHMIDT

After buying Twitter earlier this week for over 60 billion dollars, Tesla CEO and apartheid mining heir Elon Musk has set some pocket change aside for the AdelaideFree Wifi network.

‘HAHA, yes! Another smart investment by me, Elon Musk!’ said the shitposter to nobody particular.

When we informed Musk that AdelaideFree was notorious for not letting anyone connect, Elon replied ‘I know, that’s the best thing about it. It’s the perfect social network. This way, nobody can log on and make fun of me like they do on Twitter’.

‘My plan is to combine the two recent investments, Twitter and AdelaideFree, to create an app where only I can log on. That way everyone else can see the stolen normie memes I post, but can’t login to say anything about it, I’m going to call it “TwitterFree“.

‘You know me, I’m all for free speech…unless it’s something negative about me, then it’s an issue’.

‘Anyway, I’ve got to try and log in now. Do you think XÆA-Xii would be a strong enough password?’