23 July, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Adelaide Mail calendars just 12 pictures of Tea Tree Plaza done in MS Paint

DAN SCHMIDT

Because we haven’t figured out how to put an annoying paywall on this site and our website domain renewal is due, we here at the Adelaide Mail have thought up a new and very original idea on how to bring in the revenue from you suckers, our loyal readers.

It is with mild excitement that we announce our 2021 Adelaide Mail calendar, full of spelling mistakes, dates in the wrong places, and no fewer than 11 pictures of Tea Tree Plaza quickly done in MS Paint.

Because the Adelaide Mail team has never actually ventured outside of the north-eastern suburbs (and why would you ever need to?), we frankly don’t know or care what else Adelaide has to offer, so TTP is finally getting the recognition it deserves in the form of a disappointing Kris Kringle gift.

Now you may be thinking “you unfunny local Betoota Advocate ripoffs are just ripping off some unfunny local Brown Cardigan ripoffs” but that could not be further from the truth, we actually rip most of our content off of The Onion.

Each month of the calendar is essentially the same picture, except in December the Plaza’s witches hat has a Santa hat on top of it. We know that the Plaza doesn’t actually have the witches hat anymore, but if we weren’t to include it the building would be essentially indistinguishable from Yatala Labour Prison.

Also, June is missing.

Also, due to delays at the printing factory in China, the calendars won’t be posted until mid-2022.

Order yours now via fax for only $46 (plus postage and handling) to help keep this mess of a website alive.

in Life, News
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