14 May, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Campbelltown man installs sprinklers to water concrete while he’s on holiday

A Campbelltown man has installed a state-of-the-art, new sprinkler system to continue a strict routine of concrete watering over his upcoming holiday.

Flavio Gionnani grew worried about the wellbeing of his beloved concrete yard ahead of his trip, but his concerns were allayed when a friend gave him the idea to install irrigation in his otherwise desolate yard.

‘You don’t go away for two weeks and leave the concrete to fend for itself’ says Patrizio Berlusconi, Gionnani’s friend and the brains behind the idea. ‘I said to Flavio, you leave it to me, I’ll come up with a plan’.

After twelve weeks and $15,000 in irrigation equipment, Berlusconi presented his friend with the schematics for his new watering system.

You don’t go away for two weeks and leave the concrete to fend for itself

‘It comes on at five a.m. every morning for forty minutes, then drip feeds for the next hour, before a good soaking around seven’, continues Berlusconi, ‘we got the department of water to give us a special license, they think we’re raising the cattle’.

‘You look around and see all these people just leaving their concrete to die out in the sun, it makes me sick, these people. Such a waste’.

in News, Travel
Related Posts

Road workers bored with South Road, add some sick jumps to Blackwood roundabout instead

17 July, 2020

17 July, 2020

F**K IT FRIDAY: For generations road “workers” have been “working” on South Road in a quest to make some sort...

Michael Keelan referred to as Keith Conlon for the last time!

23 September, 2018

23 September, 2018

That’s it, he’s absolutely had it. At first it was funny, sometimes even a little bit flattering, but enough is...

Christopher Pyne quits politics to spend more time doing what he loves

1 March, 2019

1 March, 2019

In a coup for Adelaide Mail readers, outgoing Federal Defence Minister Christopher Pyne has revealed what his plans are for...

We rank Adelaide’s top (and only) 3 working digital Adelaide Metro signs

18 November, 2019

18 November, 2019

What was meant to be Adelaide Mail’s first barely readable, every item on a different page, advertisement clogged ‘Top 10 List’, has...

Barmera economy kept afloat entirely by TV Travel Auctions

22 January, 2019

22 January, 2019

‘Who wants to go on a holiday, holiday, holiday?’ You can hear the eternally-repeating echoes of John Dean’s famous voiceover...

Ingenious Toolie crudely changes 13 to 18 on his Year 12 jumper

25 November, 2018

25 November, 2018

In a surprisingly genius move, particularly from a Modbury High graduate, 23 year old Sam ‘Zombie’ Zommers has pulled off...

Spike in northern suburbs weddings ahead of Bali extramarital sex ban

22 September, 2019

22 September, 2019

The looming introduction of a new Indonesian law prohibiting extramarital sex and unmarried couples living together has seen a huge...

Karen no longer knows how to threaten local businesses without Today Tonight

27 November, 2019

27 November, 2019

LET ME SPEAK TO THE MANAGER!: This morning as Clarence Gardens facebook-mum of two Karen Decrows, 43, set off for...

Identically-dressed gang members terrorising Schoolies with Jesus talk

23 November, 2019

23 November, 2019

A terrifying new youth gang, reportedly referring to themselves as ‘The Green Team’ are already striking fear into the hearts...

Unley Mum-of-three wine drunk for forty-seventh consecutive night under guise of “supporting local”

9 June, 2020

9 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT Unley mother and professional car park line-ignorer* Gelded Coolslap is looking at seven straight weeks without a sober...

TAFE SA qualifications now offered on Foodland dockets with purchase over $40

3 December, 2018

3 December, 2018

The aftermath of controversy, audits, resignations, misconduct and corruption has led to TAFE SA taking drastic measures to ensure qualifications...

Old Tailem Town offers an accurate portrayal of life in South Australian country towns (in 2020)

14 September, 2020

14 September, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT South Australia’s favourite family attraction within an 80-minute drive, south-east of the city is (since Puzzle Park closed)...

Adelaide once again ranked as top Australian capital city alphabetically

15 June, 2018

15 June, 2018

For the 182nd year running, Adelaide has continued to shine as our nation’s top ranking capital city when ordered from A to Z.

Victor Harbor opens new Youth Centre for local adolescents aged 55-70

9 July, 2018

9 July, 2018

In an attempt at engaging the region’s younger demographic, Victor Harbor has launched a hip new hangout for residents born...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: