24 July, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Dad asks if you know what Myponga smells like

A Woodville South family once again became the butt of dad’s joke yesterday evening.

An hour after the family’s Mexican dinner, Dave Eyebeeyess poked his head into the lounge room and stated to nobody particular ‘Heard it’s meant to be nice weather this weekend. Maybe we should all take a day-trip down south somewhere?’

Gathering no response from his wife or two teenage daughters, Dave stated slightly louder ‘How about Myponga? Have you kids ever been there? Have you ever taken in the sights and smells of Myponga?’ as small beads of sweat started to form on his forehead.

‘Do you know what Myponga smells like? C’mon guys, My-pong-er?’

‘Kids, answer me, please!’, Dave hurried ‘Have you ever smelt My-ponger?! Do you want to smell Myponger?!’

Finally cottoning on to what was imminent, the rest of the family quickly evacuated the property via the planned escape route after retrieving their grab bags.

However, Dave was too invested into the joke to stop now. Grabbing his car keys and taking chase, an increasingly uncomfortable Dave pursued the rest of his family down Port Road, only stopping briefly at the Woodville Park OTR drive thru for a quick Moe’s Shake & Dog. They’re just like Wendy’s except worse and more expensive. 

Re-energised and with a churning stomach full of milk, bread, processed pig entrails and possibly shredded cardboard filler, Dave gained ground on his family as he sped down Main South Road, winding down his window and yelling ‘Kids! Do you want to know what Myponga smells like?!’ as his front bumper reached their rear.

Finally performing a perfect PIT maneuver he had mastered from watching all 23 seasons of Cops between the 2008 footy and cricket seasons at the corner of Main South and Causeway Road, Dave smashed the passenger window of his wife’s car and said to his screaming family ‘For the love of God, do you know what Myponga smells like?!’

As the screams turned into groans muffled by hands, Dave calmly continued, ‘Well now you know, because we’re here right now. Quite lovely isn’t it, cool fresh air away from the city and a slight hint of the nearby seawater. Ahh, fantastic. We’ll definitely come back here on the weekend, I wouldn’t mind checking out that micro-brewery. Anyway, let’s head back home, you girls have got school tomorrow’.

Editor’s note: Did you know that Myponga held South Australia’s first outdoor multi-day music festival in 1971? Black Sabbath and Daddy Cool headlined and it was absolutely insane. Listen to this AdeLOL podcast about the 1971 Myponga Pop Festival recorded live at last year’s Adelaide Fringe Festival:

Related Posts

Ingle Farm shopping centre considering radical third Coles store

13 September, 2019

13 September, 2019

Following the success of the populist “A Chicken In Every Pot, Two Coles in Every Mall” plan, Ingle Farm Shopping...

Lifelong Athelstone resident still can’t tell difference between Gorge and George

6 June, 2024

6 June, 2024

In an event that has left residents scratching their heads and emergency services mildly inconvenienced, Athelstone resident Ethel Stone has...

Behold! The Garden of Unearthly Awkward Stop and Chats

19 February, 2020

19 February, 2020

MATTHEW DEVITT Despite the highest of expectations, one Gepps Cross man’s foray into the Garden of Unearthly Delights has degenerated...

“My family is from Dublin too!” says man in desperate pickup attempt

17 March, 2023

17 March, 2023

With Saint Patrick’s Day festivities well underway in Australia, everyone with even the smallest amount of Irish heritage is pretending...

Adelaide Crows eyeing off homesick Victorian with first ever #1 pick at AFL draft

4 July, 2020

4 July, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT The Adelaide Crows are looking to the future, with the club seeking to wrap up their first ever...

New school zone speed limits “definitely not revenue-raising” says new Police Commissioner, a six-foot tall Fabergé egg

26 May, 2026

26 May, 2026

South Australia’s new 40km/h school zone speed limits have come under fire, with motorists labelling them “confusing”, “pointless” and “why...

Local woman’s life about as organised as Midnight Pharmacy

9 July, 2021

9 July, 2021

Local hot mess and ‘it’ girl (‘it’ meaning ‘shambolic’) Kay Otik’s life has taken yet another dramatic turn in a...

Victorian fails SA Driver’s Licence test after correctly zip merging

5 October, 2023

5 October, 2023

An interstate motorist has attempted to gain a South Australian Driver’s Licence but ultimately failed due to their courteous (and...

Returning SA residents can now undertake 14 Day Quarantine stuck on South Road on way home from airport

8 September, 2021

8 September, 2021

With border restrictions rapidly easing and/or increasing between many Australian states, one new local initiative gives returning South Australian residents...

Advertiser finance editor absolutely qualified to review Fringe shows

4 March, 2019

4 March, 2019

As tightening budgets continue to put pressure on satirical newspaper The Advertiser’s shrinking newsroom, the annual festival season has once...

We’re not convinced Kingswood is a real suburb either

10 July, 2018

10 July, 2018

While we’d be the first to admit that we’ve not looked into this too closely, we’re just not ready to...

Modern Day Mawson: Man goes to Golden Grove Netball Courts without jacket

22 June, 2022

22 June, 2022

SADNARCTICA: Although Saturday’s weather was sunny and calm, one local man severely underestimated the harshness Golden Grove Netball Courts’ own...

This ALDI cookware is such a bargain you’ll almost forget about Australia’s history of systemic racism

2 June, 2020

2 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT What a glorious year under the good graces of the ALDI gods it has been. Just when we...

Oh, think you’re too big to play a gig at Gawler Racecourse again, hey?

14 October, 2022

14 October, 2022

With blink-182 announcing a world tour with original guitarist Tom Delonge, 30 somethings everywhere are excited to get their hands...

Person who calls The Grove “The Grove” clearly not from around here

28 July, 2022

28 July, 2022

A shopper in Adelaide’s north-eastern suburbs has turned a few heads this morning after referring to Golden Grove’s fourth best...

Comments

Leave a Reply

Discover more from Adelaide Mail

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading