18 March, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Satirical news site runs out of TV commercials to rank, now completely out of ideas

TRENT BARTLETT

South Australia’s second favourite source of fake news has been revealed for the sham that it is, with a tournament of television jingles masquerading as an idea making way for a complete dearth of any original thoughts or observations.

While those behind this site contend that the competition in which local businesses’ songs are pitted against other local businesses’ songs was somehow satirising South Australians’ preference for consumerism over culture, we are able to reveal that the competition was merely a thinly veiled cloak for a lack of talent or creativity.

And while those at Adelaide Mail might pretend that a ham-fisted attempt at ironic self-awareness in an article such as this one lets them off the hook for failing to do the very thing they are supposed to do, (ie. be funny, apparently) the writers of this article know better than to fall for that one.

Experts are warning the public to be suspicious of any attempts to deflect a serious lack of original thoughts with an article such as this. However, those experts also have little faith in the general public ever since they voted against Noel’s Caravans.

Readers are warned to look out for the tell-tale signs of Adelaide Mail completely running out of new ideas. They come in the form of: spurious articles about the north-eastern suburbs, articles that were clearly just copied from a Seinfeld script except all references to Kramer were replaced with the word O-Bahn, an undignified attack on Shit Adelaide, an undignified attack on Caleb Bond, an undignified attack on The Advertiser or any article criticising a service station giant that is hastily removed in mysterious circumstances.

in News
Related Posts

Last SA made Commodore sells for 750k. Last SA made Mitsubishi 380 still unsold at 3k ONO.

1 February, 2021

1 February, 2021

As the last ever South Australian made Holden Commodore sold at auction for $750,000 over the weekend, a similarly iconic...

Colour blind uni student argues superiority of green and white cafe

5 October, 2019

5 October, 2019

A colour blind University of Adelaide arts student has found himself in an overly heated argument about the relative virtues...

Road workers bored with South Road, add some sick jumps to Blackwood roundabout instead

17 July, 2020

17 July, 2020

F**K IT FRIDAY: For generations road “workers” have been “working” on South Road in a quest to make some sort...

AdBlocker removes entire AdelaideNow website

22 July, 2019

22 July, 2019

As Gavin Alook was searching for an old news article about the time his school actually figured out what the...

Train carriage at new Burnside Camilla store lets locals experience public transport without going anywhere near the type of people who catch trains

1 June, 2025

1 June, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT Burnside Village’s updated Camilla boutique store has solved the public transport problem that has been plaguing the eastern...

PSA: Victorians reminded to make their highly original jokes about Adelaide before midnight tonight

21 November, 2020

21 November, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT Victorians are being reminded that the opportunity to make their scintillatingly witty observations about the South Australian capital...

Aspiring Magic Cave Father Christmas settles for Parabanks gig again

1 December, 2019

1 December, 2019

For professional shopping centre Father Christmas Claude St Velcro, it’s become a case of take what you can get. Every...

Township of Gawler produces another tradie

20 June, 2019

20 June, 2019

After committing hundreds of man-hours and thousands of dollars to a town-wide search, the northern Adelaide township of Gawler has...

Government announce second road race for December – Santa’s Tour Down Under

28 January, 2020

28 January, 2020

MATT FREEMAN Riding a wave of excitement from the Tour Down Under, the state government are set to add a...

Rob Lucas thanks Tammy from MyBudget for her assistance this week

5 September, 2018

5 September, 2018

Preparing his first budget in over 17 years, Treasurer Lucas wasn’t really sure where to start. ‘Yeah, it was a...

Local man optimistic 45th Bertie Beetle of the week will somehow taste better than the previous 44

16 September, 2025

16 September, 2025

In a bold display of misplaced hope and digestive resilience, local man Cole O’Pteran has declared that his 45th Bertie...

Haggle Co shuts down instead of simply just telling us what happened to the old Haggle guy

22 July, 2025

22 July, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT In a last-ditch attempt to bury what could be Adelaide’s most intriguing furniture commercial-adjacent mystery, furniture store and...

St Bernards Fruit & Veg guy doing all he can to help us feel no guilt about shopping at ALDI

17 October, 2023

17 October, 2023

TRENT BARTLETT A Rostrevor-based internet fruit and vegetable salesman has continued his long-running efforts to boost the sales of multinational...

Chief Medical Officer dismisses conspiracy theory that blames 5G for Caleb Bond

11 May, 2020

11 May, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT The state’s deputy-deputy chief medical officer Dr Morris Gypsum has dismissed a conspiracy theory that points the finger...

Comments

Leave a Reply

Discover more from Adelaide Mail

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading