31 March, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Dog & Duck social media guy fucking nails it, yet again

While most businesses are finding it harder and harder to have their voice heard on social media, Adelaide nightclub Dog & Duck has found a way to cut through the social media noise each and every time they interact with anybody online.

The new strategy is entitled “Free Victim Blaming With Entry” and involves ignoring, and later questioning, claims of sexual assault. It’s a bold and exciting strategy that’s set to turn social media community management on its head in 2020.

Managers of the nightspot’s social media have already put the strategy on full display this year, trying out their fresh new approach in a direct message with a patron who had alleged that she was assaulted in the Hindley Street nightcub.

It’s a bold and exciting strategy that’s set to turn social media community management on its head in 2020

The latest Dog & Duck marketing hit follows on from previous blockbusters: Free Condoms With EntryFree Durrys With EntryFree Puppies With Entry and Free Drugs With Entry — although the latter is typically offered as a surprise bonus gift from male patrons to female patrons, post-entry.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, Dog & Duck’s ground-shattering new tactic is already being taught to young PR and Marketing students across the world. With numerous ebooks, YouTube videos and short courses offered by questionable-looking RTOs already popping up.

Jordan Gary Manson is just one Self-Help Author/YouTuber/Podcaster/Blogger/Yoga Instructor/Personal Trainer/Influencer/UberEats Delivery Rider/Wrongly-Self-Described Entrepreneur who plans to cash in on the new, sizzling hot social media tactic by releasing an ebook.

The book — which has somehow already been written and is riddled with spelling errors — is titled “Bullsh*t: The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck About The Safety Of Other C*nts” and contains over thirty-six pages of self-published insight into how you can turn any potential PR nightmare into a real winner merely by potentially endangering the safety of your customers

Related Posts

Old Commodore parked by Kuitpo signals start of ‘shroom season

18 June, 2019

18 June, 2019

A TRIP TO THE FOREST: Psychedelic Mushroom hunting season was declared open last week with the initiatory shitbox sighting on Brookman...

Aspiring Magic Cave Father Christmas will probably settle for Parabanks gig again

26 October, 2018

26 October, 2018

For professional shopping centre Father Christmas Claude St Velcro, it’s become a case of take what you can get. Every...

North East Road to be 100% service stations by 2026

9 January, 2020

9 January, 2020

With the rise in popularity of X Convenience service stations and OTR’s “they build one, we build two” policy, urban planning experts have revealed that this exponential growth will lead to North East Road becoming entirely lined with service stations by mid-2026.

State govt regrets choosing papier-mâché option for Darlington upgrade

9 May, 2019

9 May, 2019

With large swathes of load-bearing wall crumbling from the Darlington upgrade of South Road over the last week, questions have...

TAFE SA qualifications now offered on Foodland dockets with purchase over $40

3 December, 2018

3 December, 2018

The aftermath of controversy, audits, resignations, misconduct and corruption has led to TAFE SA taking drastic measures to ensure qualifications...

“Stop all these bloody Adelaide city highrises” says Willunga resident

1 August, 2018

1 August, 2018

Gerald Manser, 62, of Willunga has had enough of CBD development. On his yearly trip to the city for a...

AdBlocker removes entire AdelaideNow website

22 July, 2019

22 July, 2019

As Gavin Alook was searching for an old news article about the time his school actually figured out what the...

Gran no longer needs to save her dollar coins for “laundry”

27 September, 2019

27 September, 2019

For the past twenty years grandmother Judice Freespins has been known to save every dollar coin she comes across for her...

Adelaide Metro app update to feature better arrival time accuracy of non-existent buses

12 November, 2018

12 November, 2018

In the largest app update since the ‘randomly crashing’ feature Adelaide Metro has announced the newest app feature for commuters....

People somehow shocked when Liberal govt starts privatising everything

17 May, 2019

17 May, 2019

With the state government looking for novel and opportunistic ways to deliver on pre-election fiscal promises, several key pieces of...

Rip It Up relaunches with Pokies reviews and noise complaint liftout

13 June, 2019

13 June, 2019

Heritage Adelaide street press Rip It Up magazine is set for a relaunch with a new focus on reflecting the...

SA Space Agency aims to explore Planet Nightclub

9 October, 2019

9 October, 2019

Since the establishement of South Australian Space Industry Centre, one strategic plan of the agency has been more important than...

Nuff: We interviewed this garden gnome wearing a POWER shirt and he couldn’t even name their captain

5 February, 2020

5 February, 2020

Somewhere in the backstreets of Glanville sits a cocky garden gnome claiming allegiance to the POWER. Within a manicured low-maintenance...

Cyberbullying teens never okay…unless it’s Caleb Bond and it’s really funny

18 March, 2019

18 March, 2019

Cyberbullying is a cowardly act, which can be particularly harmful when aimed at teens. However, in the wake of anti-bullying...

Outrage as advertising projected on to Adelaide’s most famous cultural landmark

9 October, 2018

9 October, 2018

The iconic brick façade of Adelaide’s West End Brewery will be used to advertise a party supplies shop after SA premier Stephen...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: