22 January, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

New food delivery service “O-Bahnacle Bill” set to challenge Uber Eats

Barnacle Bill will start delivering anywhere along the North East Busway track starting early next month.

William Cirriped, Director of Innovative Strategies at Barnacle Bill said this was a perfect opportunity to take advantage of the existing O-Bahn infrastructure.

Now instead of catching carp, they can catch a Treasure Chest pack thrown out of the window of a bus travelling at 80 kph

‘We don’t have the traffic or speed restrictions of Uber drivers. Previously picnickers along the north-east stretch of the Torrens only had one option if they desired seafood, and that was to dangle a line in the river’.

‘Now instead of catching carp, they can catch a Treasure Chest pack thrown out of the window of a bus travelling at 80 kph. And we’re quietly confident that like most of our products, it will still taste at least as good as a river carp’.

Responding to questions that this is an ill-conceived project that is only going ahead because he’s so proud of the name he came up with, Cirriped said ‘nothing could be further from the truth. I didn’t even come up with the name first, it came from one of our chip fryers at our Marden shop who threatened to sue if I used it, but he saw my point of view after he was caught on CC camera stealing a chip’.

Related Posts

Every Polites building to be heritage listed in 2020

6 September, 2019

6 September, 2019

In a surprising move by the SA Heritage Listing Council, it has been deemed that each and every Polites building...

Local tweaker very disappointed with “OG Speed Shop”

29 July, 2020

29 July, 2020

Local jaw-clenching and awake enthusiast, Aymon DeGear has voiced his disappointment with a Klemzig service station, claiming they are falsely...

International musician moves back to Adelaide to start boutique counterfeit winery

20 August, 2019

20 August, 2019

Rumours have it that US singer-songwriter and previous Adelaide resident Ben Folds is heading back to South Australia for a...

SA Space Agency aims to explore Planet Nightclub

9 October, 2019

9 October, 2019

Since the establishement of South Australian Space Industry Centre, one strategic plan of the agency has been more important than...

Instead of going to The Show, kids simply empty mum’s wallet into bin

30 August, 2019

30 August, 2019

Katalina Glispers has countless fond memories of the Royal Adelaide Show as a child. From losing her two front teeth...

“Yeah that counts as a bath” says dad who has clearly given up for the year

22 December, 2019

22 December, 2019

In what was initially meant to just be letting the kids “dip their feet in” the water play area of...

Melbourne man visits Adelaide just to complain about shop trading hours

12 January, 2019

12 January, 2019

Gouland Hambitter and his family moved to Melbourne from Adelaide when he was eight-years-old. His father had taken up a...

PSA: Victorians reminded to make their highly original jokes about Adelaide before midnight tonight

21 November, 2020

21 November, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT Victorians are being reminded that the opportunity to make their scintillatingly witty observations about the South Australian capital...

Courteous paperboy throws Messenger right next to recycle bin

13 September, 2018

13 September, 2018

Loading up the milkcrate strapped to the front of his BMX each Wednesday after school, Jackson DeGoris prepares for his...

UniSA law student happy to let you keep thinking he goes to Adelaide

23 May, 2019

23 May, 2019

Despite typically jumping to the defence of UniSA’s law degree, Esteban Cornbox is not in any hurry to correct you...

Man leverages home equity to pay for son’s frog cake addiction

2 February, 2019

2 February, 2019

Being a single parent is never easy financially, especially when you have a ten-year-old son eating upwards of three Balfours...

Burnside teen reports child abuse after dad refuses to buy her BMW X3

28 August, 2019

28 August, 2019

A 16-year-old Burnside girl has resorted to reporting her father to the Department for Child Protection after he refused to...

Cosi reveals that he actually secretly fucking hates South Australia

13 October, 2020

13 October, 2020

South Australia’s very own Andrew ‘Cosi ‘South Aussie With Cosi’’ Costello has revealed a little-known fact about himself in a...

You WON’T BELIEVE what Kane Cornes said on SEN 1629AM! Mainly because of all the static

11 December, 2020

11 December, 2020

He’s done it again, folks. South Australia’s king of controversy and 2020’s Best and Fairest Servo Sandwich Hawker has made...

REVEALED: Seven Stars Hotel actually only has 4.3 star Google rating

7 November, 2019

7 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South Australia, today...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: