26 September, 2022

Keith Conlon announced as new drummer for I Killed The Prom Queen

In a bold new move by Adelaide’s metalcore kings I Killed The Prom Queen, the announcement of veteran radio broadcaster and Postcards host Keith “Conlon has come as a shock to many, but not the man himself.

‘Yes, traditionally I have dabbled in jazz’, said Keith ‘but I’ve always been a metalhead at heart. I frequently wanted to spin some Parkway Drive or Pantera when I was on 5AA breakfast, but Jane Reilly wouldn’t let me’.

As soon as I got the call-up I rushed out and got some full sleeve tattoos done

I Killed The Prom Queen guitarist Jona Weinhofen stated that he knows Keith will be a perfect fit for the band. ‘I saw him doing some jazz drumming on the rotunda pageant float one year, and I just knew that this badass could really throwdown for us. Just have to change the drum brushes for sticks and get him a double-kick pedal and we’ll be set’.

Keith is reportedly overjoyed at the invite to join the band, and intends to fully embrace the melodic metalcore look. ‘As soon as I got the call-up I rushed out and got some full sleeve tattoos done, I started running out of ideas of what to get by the time they got to my left forearm, so I guess I’m stuck with this Jon Blake portrait until I can think of a cover up’.

Related Posts

Magic Cave now just a ‘Magic 3 x 4 metre room’

19 November, 2018

19 November, 2018

Budget cuts and declining sponsors have hit the Magic Cave hard this year, with Santa and his entire grotto allocated...

“Walk To Work Day” actually fastest commute for city workers using South Road

2 September, 2022

2 September, 2022

With today being national “Walk To Work Day”, many southern suburbs to CBD commuters have found that walking along South...

Vincent Rinaldo very disappointed by this so called ‘Fringe’ Festival

22 February, 2019

22 February, 2019

One of Adelaide’s leading hair and fashion icons, Vincent Rinaldo, has left a scathing review the opening week of the...

UniSA law student happy to let you keep thinking he goes to Adelaide

23 May, 2019

23 May, 2019

Despite typically jumping to the defence of UniSA’s law degree, Esteban Cornbox is not in any hurry to correct you...

OTR’s solution to unhappy customers: Get rid of the angry man button

3 December, 2019

3 December, 2019 1

Having grown annoyed at the constant stream of customers pushing the ‘angry’ button upon exit, OTR has moved to eliminate...

Big Red Car mag wheels stolen at Elizabeth City Centre

31 October, 2018

31 October, 2018

Disappointed children and slightly relieved parents have arrived at Elizabeth Shopping Centre to find the multi-coloured mag wheels stolen from...

Hinkley, Pyke given 3-year contract extensions to teach them a lesson

23 July, 2019

23 July, 2019

In light of two equally inconsistent seasons, both South Australian AFL clubs have found themselves scratching their heads at what...

SA Water announce new Adelaide theme park ‘Burst Water Main World’

8 August, 2019

8 August, 2019

In an attempt to diversify revenue streams ahead of its probable privatisation, SA Water has revealed plans to open its...

New “DogKeeper” package grants people $10,000 in Dogs Dollars for rent or Smirnoff Double Blacks

27 July, 2020

27 July, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT As South Australia grapples with the ongoing economic impact of COVID-19, the Federal Government has moved to stimulate...

99.98% of all SA servo robberies perpetrated by the servo

12 March, 2019

12 March, 2019

South Australia has the highest service station robbery rates in the nation. However, largely due to our Peregrine overlords, it...

ShitAdelaide changes name to MAFSadelaide

8 April, 2019

8 April, 2019

Originally a source of general ridicule at the expense of Adelaide’s drunk and poor, the mysterious owners behind Instagram account...

Annoying guy in office being sent to Victoria on ‘Special Assignment’ at 3:20 Tuesday

22 March, 2020

22 March, 2020

Following this morning’s ‘emergency meeting’ of the Management, Leadership and Everybody Except Jason Team, the office’s most annoying staff, Jason,...

Royal Park Salvage mascot should really get that middle leg looked at

11 February, 2020

11 February, 2020

Look, we’re not going to pretend we know what Royal Park Salvage does, or even go to the effort of...

Returning SA residents can now undertake 14 Day Quarantine stuck on South Road on way home from airport

8 September, 2021

8 September, 2021

With border restrictions rapidly easing and/or increasing between many Australian states, one new local initiative gives returning South Australian residents...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: