14 April, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Norwood cafe Argo to begin taking bookings for those who just want to line up

In a move described by industry experts as ‘revolutionary’, the popular eastern suburbs brunch spot Argo is to begin taking reservations for people who simply want to stand in queue for up to 40 minutes.

We’re told that you can expect such menu items as: getting in people’s way, having overhead plants drip dirty water on you and making your boyfriend take photos of you standing against a wall

The new dining option – which is being marketed, rather cumbersomely as ‘Argo and wait in a line for up to 40 minutes while you’re hungry and complaining about being hungover in your activewear’ – has been introduced primarily for those with special dietary requirements, specifically the keto-vegan-coeliacs who somehow manage to make menu changes to an order of table water.

For those lucky enough to have secured a booking for the Argo queue experience, we’re told that you can expect such menu items as: getting in people’s way, having overhead plants drip dirty water on you and making your boyfriend take photos of you standing against a wall.

While bookings are encouraged, the cafe is accepting walk-ups although they have been told to expect a long wait.

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