28 November, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Wayville Physio still recovering from closure of Mad Mouse

It’s been over a decade since the closure of Adelaide’s iconic roller-coaster the ‘Mad Mouse’, but the financial impacts can still be seen on the Wayville health micro-economy. Physiotherapist Jessica Smitz states that the ten year recession has nearly come at the cost of her business and livelihood.

‘I opened here in 2005, right across from the Showgrounds and signed a twenty year lease as I knew business would always be booming as long as that deathtrap was still operating’, Jessica stated.

After 2007, business has suffered dramatically and I’m only now just getting back on my feet

‘Those were the days, I was running a 24/7 operation with two dozen staff each September, bringing in over $300k that month alone’.

‘We had people lining up out the door with whiplash, muscle contusion, slipped discs, you name it’, Jessica recalled ‘but after 2007, business has suffered dramatically and I’m only now just getting back on my feet’.

When asked how she felt about the advances in rider safety in newer amusement rides, Jessica replied ‘They’re a real pain in the neck. Actually, no, they’re not…and that’s the problem! Please don’t use that quote in the paper, I’ll sound like a stupid idiot’.

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