5 September, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Local woman caught lustfully gazing at Hindmarsh Square tree again

DAN SCHMIDT

A local MILF in your area who wants to meet you but you never click on the popups has once again been caught staring at the very long and nicely curved tree in Hindmarsh Square.

It has been reported that Dee Siring has taken yet another lunchbreak in Hindmarsh Square, making it the third time this week. Which is quite remarkable considering her office is located in Morphett Vale.

After pulling out a large waterproof picnic rug and her lunch which included a nice big glass of champagne, Dee became almost entranced whilst staring at the enthralling evergreen.

‘What?’ Dee said snapping out of her daydream ‘I just really like observing nature. Nothing wrong with that. They say nature mindfulness is good for you. Oh my, see, look at that, I’ve been here three hours and haven’t even realised. Goodness’.

‘It’s just nice to quietly observe the tall, long, strong…curved…um, please excuse me’.

Dee hurried off only to return for her belongings about ten minutes later looking flustered yet relieved.

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