25 June, 2022

Adelaide Mail calls for Adelaide Oval to have ONLY Scoreboards and Hills

DAN SCHMIDT

With former Liberal MP Christopher Pyne clearly rapidly running out of ideas for things to write about in satirical newspaper The Advertiser, he has now voiced his unwanted opinion on a proposal that is almost equally as unwanted.

The former Defence Minister and current tram enthusiast has called for the historic Adelaide Oval scoreboard to be demolished and famous Hill to be flattened in order to make way for another grandstand. A move in which will leave Adelaide Oval almost indistinguishable from any other large Australian sports stadium.

Upon release of the opinion piece, Pyne neglected to talk to ABC Radio and also the Adelaide Mail (most likely because we didn’t make any attempt whatsoever to contact him).

Adelaide Mail, now using our own platform to also voice our unwanted opinion, counter propose that Adelaide Oval be redeveloped to only include Scoreboards and Hills. Tear the grandstands down, line the perimeter with replica scoreboards, and surround the oval with a long continuous grassy knoll. How sick would that be? The only downside we can see is that Crows fans would have trouble standing for some time because of their gammy hips and they’d now have nothing to do with their knitted seat cushions.

Sure, it will vastly limit the crowd capacity, but is that really an issue these days anyway? Like, Port Power Football Club could only manage to sell 20,000 tickets to a home final on the weekend. Pathetic.

Related Posts

New “Farmers Onion” Iced Coffee flavour only popular with one man

29 October, 2019

29 October, 2019

In a bold new move by South Australia’s highest selling beverage company, the new Farmer’s Union, “Farmer’s Onion” Iced Coffee...

Vincent Rinaldo very disappointed by this so called ‘Fringe’ Festival

22 February, 2019

22 February, 2019

One of Adelaide’s leading hair and fashion icons, Vincent Rinaldo, has left a scathing review the opening week of the...

“Stop all these bloody Adelaide city highrises” says Willunga resident

1 August, 2018

1 August, 2018

Gerald Manser, 62, of Willunga has had enough of CBD development. On his yearly trip to the city for a...

Even at Cudlee Creek “Free Hugs” guy still seems very creepy

16 January, 2020

16 January, 2020

CUDDLY CREEP: At a time where most South Australians are selflessly coming together to support those affected by bushfires, one...

Man scores entire week stay at Scotty’s Motel with $50 Travel Voucher

6 January, 2021

6 January, 2021

As one of the dozens of South Australians lucky enough to get a Great State Voucher after the Tourism Commission’s...

Every Polites building to be heritage listed in 2020

6 September, 2019

6 September, 2019

In a surprising move by the SA Heritage Listing Council, it has been deemed that each and every Polites building...

Stupid Klemzig resident gets on express bus again

1 October, 2019

1 October, 2019

For the fourth time in as many weeks, Branden Burg of Klemzig has once again managed to find himself on...

10 things you never knew about the Myer Centre

26 April, 2020

26 April, 2020

MATTHEW DEVITT All of this madness at the moment has made us realise what’s really important to us: mostly-empty, multi-level...

Man celebrates 40th birthday by agreeing with Leon Byner for the first time

12 October, 2018

12 October, 2018

Drew Ratcage has never been too bothered by the prospect of turning 40, that was until he found himself nodding...

Milo Kerrigan inducted into SA Sporting Hall of Fame

22 July, 2020

22 July, 2020

S-S-SOWWFORSTRAYLLEEYYAH: The SA Sporting Hall of Fame recognises sporting heroes that have helped shape South Australian culture and inspired our future...

Next 8 hours of office chat reserved for ‘that weather last night’

19 August, 2020

19 August, 2020

When the most interesting thing to happen to the typical office employee between the hours of 5pm and 9am is...

Farmers Union releases Iced Coffee flavoured LPG Gas. Don’t ask why, just buy it.

15 October, 2021

15 October, 2021

Since launching the Iced Coffee flavoured doughnut, the team at Farmer’s Union have quickly realised that the majority of you...

People somehow shocked when Liberal govt starts privatising everything

17 May, 2019

17 May, 2019

With the state government looking for novel and opportunistic ways to deliver on pre-election fiscal promises, several key pieces of...

You can visit Red Square this weekend! (And by ‘Red Square’ we mean some ginger nerd)

20 May, 2020

20 May, 2020

With news breaking that pubs will not commence reopening until June, there are still plenty of ways to have fun...

You WON’T BELIEVE what Kane Cornes said on SEN 1629AM! Mainly because of all the static

11 December, 2020

11 December, 2020

He’s done it again, folks. South Australia’s king of controversy and 2020’s Best and Fairest Servo Sandwich Hawker has made...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: