4 November, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Guy who hasn’t been to the Casino in 15 years can’t wait to play that horse racing game again

It’s been nearly fifteen years since Whyalla man Mitch Brokeslad has ventured on down to Adelaide, but an invitation to an old mate’s bachelor party was something he couldn’t resist.

‘We’re garn’ de-Cass!’ was the very first thing Mitch excitedly yelled as he answered a call from Adelaide Mail reporters. We still don’t know how he knew it was us calling and that this is exactly what we wanted to speak with him about.

The perhaps mildly-psychic man continued, ‘Mate, it’s garn’ be awesome. Haven’t been in years but it was wicked last time I went. Do you know they got this bar on the ground level and the drink prices are like a stock exchange, going up and down? Mate, I’m going to crash the market, because when I get there heaps of drinks will be going down…my throat!’

We didn’t have the heart to tell him that bar no longer exists, because he seemed so proud of the joke.

‘But what I’m looking forward to the most’, Mitch continued ‘is that little mechanical horse-racing game on the top level. Had some huge wins last time I was there. Heaps of fun too, all the lads would get around it, cheering on their horses’.

Can’t wait to cheer on those little mechanical stallions again

Again, we didn’t have the heart to tell him that the admittedly insanely fun mechanical horse game no longer exists. Reports state it was removed some years ago after animal rights protesters stormed the Casino and damaged the machine, hoping the horses would escape.

‘Tell ya’ what though, I gotta get some new threads. There’s no way they’d let me in wearing my usual shorts, sneakers and baseball cap, the Adelaide Casino is a real classy place’.

Once again, we didn’t have the heart to tell him.

Related Posts

Casual Crows fan unsure if he’s supposed to love or hate Tex this week

3 June, 2019

3 June, 2019

With his form flip-flopping since the 2017 AFL Grand Final, Adelaide co-captain Taylor Walker has been the cause of much...

Local woman decides to ruin day by reading comments on Advertiser article

30 May, 2022

30 May, 2022

‘Maybe someone has something insightful to ad’ mistakenly thought Tay Bloyd once again. Despite having a perfectly fine morning, Tay...

Farmers Union to launch new milk-based sports energy drink

16 December, 2020

16 December, 2020

"The curdle helps you clear the hurdles"

Haigh’s prepare store for influx of Greeks this week

23 April, 2019

23 April, 2019

With the traditional Christian-Easter done and dusted and most of Adelaide in a pre-diabetic state, iconic chocolatiers Haigh’s have undertaken...

Premier welcomes new Elon Musk Death Star, points to 100 new jobs for Tonsley

27 May, 2025

27 May, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT South Australian Premier Peter Malinauskas has shown his support for a new Tesla-branded Death Star in the suburb...

Goolwa Line Electrified

15 June, 2022

15 June, 2022

Whilst the SteamRanger Cockle Train has always been a reliable mode of public transport for Middleton residents commuting to their...

CBD skateboarders disappointed at lack of actual ramp outside RAH

9 November, 2018

9 November, 2018

Dozens of skateboarders gathered outside the Royal Adelaide Hospital Emergency Department yesterday as news spread about a new ramp near...

Demand for SA produce leads to spike in exports of Adelaide tap water

21 June, 2019

21 June, 2019

With the growing international reputation of South Australian food and wine, foodies from around the world have begun to develop...

SA Govt stops tourists entering state from late March under “Operation Business As Usual”

24 March, 2020

24 March, 2020

From 4pm today South Australia will close its borders to all non-essential visitors in response to the spread of COVID-19....

How many of these top 10 ultimate 90’s Adelaide moments do you remember?

13 August, 2020

13 August, 2020

NOT CLICKBAIT! The top 10 90's Adelaide moments.

Fringe show releases new promotional image following KKK backlash

22 January, 2020

22 January, 2020

Adelaide Fringe has responded to an online petition urging them to pull support of a controversial BDSM show after an...

South Australians tipped to consume $3bn worth of Zooper Doopers today

24 January, 2019

24 January, 2019

While many today will be doing their best to not think about just how high the mercury is expected to...

Barnacle Bill showbag already starting to smell

2 September, 2025

2 September, 2025

It has only been one week since William Cruztayzion made the financial misdeed of attending the Royal Adelaide Show with...

Burnside Village Christmas tree also dies somehow

21 December, 2023

21 December, 2023

In a scene reminiscent of a decade past, another tree has met its demise in Adelaide’s fourth least-worst shopping centre....

Mount Gambier & Riverland residents set to miss out on not seeing the footy on Saturdays as Channel Seven goes off the air

16 June, 2025

16 June, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT The WIN Network has announced that Channel Seven will cease broadcasting in Mount Gambier and the Riverland from...

Comments
Leave a Reply