20 October, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Stupid Klemzig resident gets on express bus again

For the fourth time in as many weeks, Branden Burg of Klemzig has once again managed to find himself on an express O-Bahn bus from the city to Tea Tree Plaza.

A mistake than should only be made once in a person’s life has become a common occurrence for Branden, resulting in many lost hours, much embarrassment, and worst of all, having to spend some time at Tea Tree Plaza interchange.

Yeah mum…I’ll be a bit late…Yeah, the express again

‘I just keep forgetting to look at the bus number, hey?’ said Branden ‘usually it’s ‘cos I’m engrossed in the latest episode of “The Masked Singer” on my phone, or sometimes it’s ‘cos I’m crackin’ up at the heaps funny ShitAdelaide memes, dunno why I keep doin’ it hey?’ Branden asked rhetorically.

While it is clear that Branden is a stupid idiot, Adelaide Mail followed Branden to see how this kept happening, believing it surely couldn’t happen two days in a row.

We watched Branden leave the Currie St. TAFE campus where he is in his fifth year of a one semester ‘Learn Lightroom’ course, where he sure enough hopped straight on to the 541X. Following him onto the bus, Branden hit the stop button as we approached Klemzig interchange, causing several other passengers to turn around and have a look at who the idiot is today.

As the bus passed Klemzig, Branden let out an audible ‘Oh, not again!’, after which he paused a repeat episode of “Two and a Half Men” (which he was playing without headphones), then put his phone to his ear and said ‘Yeah mum…I’ll be a bit late…Yeah, the express again’.

Ten minutes later Branden got off at Tea Tree Plaza, avoiding the annoying teenagers while he waited for a bus back to Klemzig.

He got on the C2X.

Related Posts

Urgent health alert issued for anybody who visited PJ’s on a Thursday in the mid-2000s

4 August, 2020

4 August, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT People who visited an Irish-themed Adelaide city pub on a Thursday night after 9pm in the mid-2000s are...

Local hip-hop trio find religion, rename themselves ‘Hillsong Hoods’

29 May, 2019

29 May, 2019

In a move that has shocked the hip-hop community, Adelaide’s most influential hip-hop group, Hilltop Hoods, have announced a change...

Easter weekend marks beginning of ‘Be afraid to wear your Kathmandu jacket in public’ season

11 April, 2020

11 April, 2020

It’s easy to forget that Easter carries with it a deeper, important meaning for so many in our community. For...

Business on former site of Barnacle Bill is not fooling anyone

22 January, 2020

22 January, 2020

Editor’s note: The most knowledgeable person on all things South Australian (that we know about, at least) Dave Walsh has...

Sight of OTR toilet instantly cures man’s violent diarrhoea

7 December, 2018

7 December, 2018

After a week in Bali and a big ‘welcome home’ night with the boys, city construction labourer, Trey Dee, was...

Changes to medi-hotel rules means no more licking guests in quarantine without a permit

25 November, 2020

25 November, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT It has been a tradition in South Australia since the nineteenth century, but one stroke of a pen...

“Melbourne is so much better” says girl who couldn’t afford to live there

16 July, 2019

16 July, 2019

Having recently moved back to Adelaide after a brief stint in Australia’s most consistently overcast city, polaroid photography student Edith...

New SA retail forecast in: All Rundle Mall shops to shut by 2021

21 February, 2020

21 February, 2020

The latest numbers are in for South Australia’s economy, and it’s not good news for the state’s struggling retail sector....

Man scores entire week stay at Scotty’s Motel with $50 Travel Voucher

6 January, 2021

6 January, 2021

As one of the dozens of South Australians lucky enough to get a Great State Voucher after the Tourism Commission’s...

All 17 South Australian rugby fans very excited

4 November, 2020

4 November, 2020

DAN SCHMIDT Ahead of tonight’s opening State of Origin (it’s for some sport called rugby, we checked) game tonight, the...

We rank Adelaide’s most livable suburbs

10 June, 2021

10 June, 2021 1

With the announcement of Adelaide being ranked the world’s 3rd most livable city, the time has come to take a...

170kg Clapham man favourite for Bay Sheffield after being handed 105m handicap

28 December, 2018

28 December, 2018

Cuddly giant Kade Gypsum has steamed ahead as the bookies’ favourite for the iconic Bay Sheffield foot race after being...

REVEALED: Chicken Chef actually only qualified as a Kitchenhand

4 November, 2019

4 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South...

AFP raids Adelaide Mail offices only to find Xavier Minniecon

5 June, 2019

5 June, 2019

One year after publishing a damning exposé on the existence of the fictional suburb Kingswood, Australian Federal Police officers have...

SA Liberal Party discovers crafty new way to make up for drop in GST revenue

7 October, 2020

7 October, 2020

Those paying attention to state treasurer Rob Lucas this week would have seen that he was largely unperturbed by the...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: