26 January, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Adelaide local recommends Kangaroo Island to tourists, despite having never visited

TRENT BARTLETT

With his family down from Sydney for the week, Gaelen Fogarty of Glengowrie, was faced with the uneasy proposition of constructing a South Australian tourism itinerary for his visiting relatives.

‘To be honest, they’re probably spending a few days too long down here’, Mr Fogarty told the Mail. ‘I don’t know where they got the idea to spend three whole days in Adelaide’.

‘By Thursday night we’d already been wine tasting at twelve different wineries, climbed the Big Rocking Horse, whispered swear words to each other through the whispering wall and caught the tram to the bay. That was all within the first six hours’.

I don’t know where they got the idea to spend three whole days in Adelaide

After exhausting his list of favourite wineries, Fogarty sent his uncle, aunty and their two children to Kangaroo Island for the remaining part of their trip. ‘It’s a beautiful place, I assume. I mean, I can’t say for sure, I’ve never been. Too expensive, probably’.

‘The kids are really excited though’, continues Fogarty, ‘they can’t wait to see how kangaroos are used in day-to-day situations down there. I imagine it’s like a Fred Flintstone-type situation with all the ‘roos’.

‘Except, instead of dinosaurs and woolly mammoths, they’re using kangaroo pouches for cement mixers and little joeys under the sink for their garbage disposals. It’s truly a magical place, I’m guessing’.

in Travel
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