30 November, 2021 South Australia's other fake news source

Joe reveals how he keeps the prices so low: all the appliances are just chocolate wrapped in foil

As the proprietor of an inner-suburban discount electrical store it would come as no surprise to you that Joe [last name withheld because we couldn’t be bothered doing the research] would be near the top of our list of South Australia’s top business minds

Adelaide Furniture & Electrical ranked at number 15 on Adelaide Mail’s list of the best 28 SA-owned businesses. We wanted to write a top 30 list, but there are only 28 locally-owned businesses remaining since a combination of OTR, Woolworths and Coles succeeded in purchasing all but 1.6 per cent of South Australian businesses.

Nevertheless, 15 out of 28 is pretty good by anyone’s measure. And when we say ‘good’, we mean average. So Adelaide Mail sat down with Joe Lastnamewithheld to see if we could tap in to that famous business mind.

AM: Hey Joe…

JOE: Don’t say it.

AM:

JOE: No, don’t.

AM:

JOE: When I spoke on the phone to your editor he told me that you wouldn’t say that line. He was very clear about that and so was I. I said that if you make that joke I would terminate the interview. Every day for the last two decades it’s: ‘Hey Joe, how do you keep the prices so low?, Hey Joe, how do you keep the prices so low? HEY JOE, HOW DO YOU KEEP THE PRICES SO LOW??!!!’ I just want to fucking scream…

AM: Umm, how do you keep the prices so low?

At this point in the interview Joe stormed off for some reason which was entirely unprofessional in our eyes. But we took a look around the store and it turns out that everything (all of the fridges, all of the dishwashers, those sets of tables that just get smaller and smaller and smaller) they’re all actually just big chocolate treats in the shape of appliances and covered in alfoil.

So that’s how he keeps the prices so low. That wasn’t so hard, was it, Joe?

Another example of South Australian businesses punching above their weight. Or in this case, very much within their weight division.

in Life, News
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