29 September, 2022

New real time fuel app helps motorists find cheapest petrol by simply eliminating OTR servos

DAN SCHMIDT

The new RAA real-time fuel app provides South Australian motorists with current information about where to find the cheapest nearby fuel. However, users have noticed one service station is missing from the real-time data.

The app builder, Bill Dapps (who looks exactly like what you think an app developer looks like) told Adelaide Mail ‘Well, it was a waste of time including some servos, really’ without turning his attention away from a six-monitor setup displaying various anime desktop backgrounds and tracking obscure cryptocurrencies.

‘Let’s be honest, I’ve looked at the analytics and this app is exclusively used by suburban tightarse dads aged 40 to 65 who think they can beat the system by driving several kilometres to save two and a half cents a litre’.

‘People are only on this app to find the cheapest fuel, so it was basically a waste of time to include OTR servos in the data. I’ve got better things to spend my time on’.

When questioned about what these better things actually were, Dapps rattled off a bunch of nerd shit we didn’t really understand or care about, then stated ‘I’m working on other local servo apps too. First there will the the cryptocurrency one “X-COINvenience”, going to be huge. Plus I’m currently building one that shows which service stations have the best energy drink deals. OTR are definitely included in that one, two Mothers for $5.99 at the moment, that’s good deal in anyone’s books’ he stated whilst simultaneously finishing and cracking another comically large looking can.

Note: A big thanks to one of our very few readers, Mikey, for this headline and story idea. Sue him, not us.

Related Posts

Facebook update enables prefilled “Can u deliver to Gawler?” question on Marketplace

18 August, 2022

18 August, 2022

The latest Facebook app update has been welcomed by Gawler residents, as the new prefilled Marketplace question will save them...

PM Scott Morrison takes credit for stopping the Buffalo

14 October, 2018

14 October, 2018

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has taken credit for stopping the land-bound, abandoned restaurant the HMS Buffalo while on a whistle-stop...

Business who still hasn’t added 8 to phone number probably shonky

18 October, 2019

18 October, 2019

A television and VCR repair shop on Goodwood Road in Adelaide’s inner south is staring the wind of change in...

‘What’s Sydney got that Adelaide doesn’t?’ says man who can’t find job

15 July, 2019

15 July, 2019

Unemployed volleyball salesman and indiscriminately parochial South Australian Conrad Junkles is often leaping to the defence of his home state....

Buffalo replica replica to honour memory of Buffalo replica

30 January, 2019

30 January, 2019

Just hours after it was announced that Glenelg’s landmark Buffalo restaurant would be demolished due to its state of disrepair,...

Glam Adelaide intern fired for only reposting Southport Beach stairs six times in a week

31 August, 2020

31 August, 2020

A social media intern at South Australia’s home of lifestyle news and filtered drone photos, Glam Adelaide, has been let...

‘Fool me 47 times, shame on you’ say Crows as they draft new Victorian

28 November, 2019

28 November, 2019

Adelaide Football Club’s recruitment team are all smiles this morning, emerging from the first leg of the 2019 AFL Draft...

Now here’s something we don’t mind Victoria stealing from SA

6 November, 2019

6 November, 2019

News has broken on several less reputable news-sites that failed Mayo candidate and novelty cheque aficionado Georgina Downer will be...

Aspiring Magic Cave Father Christmas settles for Parabanks gig again

1 December, 2019

1 December, 2019

For professional shopping centre Father Christmas Claude St Velcro, it’s become a case of take what you can get. Every...

Man calling a ‘parmi’ a ‘parma’ rightfully run out of town

21 March, 2019

21 March, 2019

Jolkeep Johnton thought that he was masking his innate Victorian-ness well, he would pronounce the word ‘graph’ with an almost...

Old Le Cornu site to become new Swedish Furniture store ‘De Körneu’

22 May, 2019

22 May, 2019

The Adelaide City Council has made the announcement of what will finally be done with the ever controversial old Le...

Adelaide Rams fan very disappointed

14 February, 2022

14 February, 2022

After seeing a constant stream of betting company advertisements stating that the Rams would be playing a big game this...

“Never drink Coopers again? I didn’t say that.” says man who definitely said that

3 January, 2019

3 January, 2019

MATTHEW DEVITT In an astonishing reverse of his staunch moral standing, Ascot Park man David Baker has come under scrutiny...

REVEALED: Dumpling King not even really royalty

11 November, 2019

11 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South...

BREAKING: Modbury Hospital still a really fugly building

19 July, 2021

19 July, 2021 1

With news of a positive COVID-19 case in the North-East suburbs, we hope that it is fully vaccinated against the...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: