24 October, 2026 South Australia's Other Fake News Source

Haigh’s prepare store for influx of Greeks this week

With the traditional Christian-Easter done and dusted and most of Adelaide in a pre-diabetic state, iconic chocolatiers Haigh’s have undertaken a hasty re-brand of their Adelaide stores in an attempt to secure the Greek market.

Assistant vice-chief of marketing, Iva Cocoabean stated that the iconic store frontage and shop interior will ‘go greek’ until next Sunday.

‘We’ve undertaken a lot of market research, and have found that Greek-Australians are typically buying their Easter chocolates at a reduced priced from the chain stores, so we knew something had to be done to attract this market.’ stated Iva.

Based purely on viewing half an episode of Acropolis Now, a Con the Fruiterer skit, and the Con Polites episode of AdeLOL podcast, for the next week, the Rundle Mall Haigh’s store will now run a Lamb Gyros spit and play LCD’s ‘Zorba’s Dance’ club remix on repeat.

‘The lengths we have gone to is quite extraordinary,’ continued Iva ‘in an attempt to gain the market we’ve completely redone the whole store, hired some of those dancing guys in the white dresses and even given our staff lessons in Greek-Austral slang. However, we know what will really attract the Greek crowd is simply lowering the prices of easter eggs for the next “cuppla’-days”.’

If you thought this article was slightly inappropriate, give a listen to AdeLOL’s “Heaps Good History” podcast episode about Con Polites. Sheesh, what a terrible Greek accent.

Related Posts

Fringe comedian claiming to have performed at Edinburgh just told some jokes outside the RAAF base

16 March, 2022

16 March, 2022

As the Adelaide Fringe Festival begins to wind down, some local comedians are resorting to new tactics in an attempt...

Fullarton Road servo sells out of these sunnies for some reason

1 March, 2019

1 March, 2019

In what has been described by economists as an unpredicted and alarming spike in demand, a Fullarton Road service station...

Road workers bored with South Road, add some sick jumps to Blackwood roundabout instead

17 July, 2020

17 July, 2020

F**K IT FRIDAY: For generations road “workers” have been “working” on South Road in a quest to make some sort...

German tourist in Hahndorf just can’t understand why Adelaide’s Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz is so confusing

5 August, 2026

5 August, 2026

MATTHEW DEVITT A German tourist has been left mystified by South Australia’s cavalier and generally indifferent attitude towards the governmental...

Golden Grove resident protests removal of trees

17 January, 2020

17 January, 2020

As news breaks that over 180 trees will be removed from the streets of Golden Grove, one resident is doing...

Tea Tree Plaza now investigating accuracy of Einstein mural quote

30 November, 2021

30 November, 2021

After falsely attributing a quote to Sir David Attenborough in a public mural, Tea Tree Plaza’s mural and roof leak...

Next election, let’s just all vote for Cosi and see what happens

24 May, 2019

24 May, 2019

With the Federal Election over and not a great deal changing, aside from increased health-care costs for the poor, many...

Five fun things to do this weekend in…*checks sign*…GLENELP

12 November, 2021

12 November, 2021

GLENELP is apparently a small seaside city that very few locals know about. Unfamiliar even to Google Maps, which keeps...

Easter weekend marks beginning of ‘Be afraid to wear your Kathmandu jacket in public’ season

11 April, 2020

11 April, 2020

It’s easy to forget that Easter carries with it a deeper, important meaning for so many in our community. For...

SA Liberals enter 1,174th day of their controversial ‘Nobody Knows Who The Hell Our Leader Is’ strategy

6 June, 2025

6 June, 2025

TRENT BARTLETT The South Australian Liberal Party has today entered its 1,174th consecutive day of Operation: Nobody Knows Who The...

Rob Lucas thanks Tammy from MyBudget for her assistance this week

5 September, 2018

5 September, 2018

Preparing his first budget in over 17 years, Treasurer Lucas wasn’t really sure where to start. ‘Yeah, it was a...

Vincent Rinaldo very disappointed by this so called ‘Fringe’ Festival

22 February, 2019

22 February, 2019

One of Adelaide’s leading hair and fashion icons, Vincent Rinaldo, has left a scathing review the opening week of the...

Homeowner a bit suss on this tradie fixing their fence

13 November, 2020

13 November, 2020

When Jessica Footings-Colorbond of Banksia Park was searching for a traidie to fix her fence, she should have known better...

Government announce second road race for December – Santa’s Tour Down Under

28 January, 2020

28 January, 2020

MATT FREEMAN Riding a wave of excitement from the Tour Down Under, the state government are set to add a...

Premier seen pacing hallways in cold sweats after almost going 36 hours without announcing a sporting event

11 June, 2026

11 June, 2026

South Australian Premier Peter Malinauskas has reportedly been found pacing the halls of Parliament House in a drenched polo shirt...

Comments
Leave a Reply

Discover more from Adelaide Mail

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading