6 July, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Christopher Pyne quits politics to spend more time doing what he loves

In a coup for Adelaide Mail readers, outgoing Federal Defence Minister Christopher Pyne has revealed what his plans are for his impending retirement, with the MP telling the Mail he looks forward to treating every day of retirement as if it were his first time on the tram.

The member for Sturt says that he is planning a jam-packed calendar of fun, Mr Bean-esque outings.

Day 1 – “Lunch on Malcolm’s yacht!”

Day 2 – “Quality time with the wife”

Day 3 – “Ride on the yellow, bendy, rail bus again”

Day 4 – “Walk along the big wall”

Day 5 – “Finally get Mickey’s signature”

Day 6 – “Front row seats with Jack Nicklaus”

Day 7 – “I’m not even scared of rollercoasters anymore”

Related Posts

Courteous paperboy throws Messenger right next to recycle bin

13 September, 2018

13 September, 2018

Loading up the milkcrate strapped to the front of his BMX each Wednesday after school, Jackson DeGoris prepares for his...

Adelaide Mail announces new subscriber-only service Adelaide Mail Premium

1 April, 2020

1 April, 2020

It is with great excitement that the team at Adelaide Mail announces the next phase in our journey. Wall-to-wall paywalls...

Adelaide Metro bus driver sets heater to a nice comfortable 48 degrees

2 July, 2020

2 July, 2020

As we enter the middle of a mild winter, Adelaide public transport operators are doing the best to ensure the...

State Liberals sign sponsorship deal with Dulux in attempt to whitewash their reputation

17 February, 2020

17 February, 2020

With their reputation already facing questions thanks to former Liberal MP Sam ‘Wandering Hands’ Duluk, the South Australian Liberal Party...

REVEALED: Chicken Chef actually only qualified as a Kitchenhand

4 November, 2019

4 November, 2019

As part of Adelaide Mail’s “you should know this” investigative journalism article series, where we expose secrets from around South...

Penfolds to release limited edition cask Grange

20 December, 2019

20 December, 2019

In an effort to appeal to a wider and less affluent market, Penfolds have taken a new and innovative direction for their...

Push to save The Thebby so that bands can continue to skip it on tours

9 July, 2019

9 July, 2019

Rich in tradition, it’s the Adelaide live music venue that has been skipped by thousands of bands on their Australian...

Burnside SUV driver will definitely only be five minutes in the loading zone

20 July, 2018

20 July, 2018

Burnside stay-at-home daughter Jacinta Hyacinth was caught short this morning on her usual coffee meet with the girls at trendy...

Moana commuter really appreciates that 20m stretch of Fiveash Dr with the 70kmh speed limit

30 June, 2020

30 June, 2020

TRENT BARTLETT A Moana resident who commutes to Adelaide’s eastern suburbs every day for work, has once again sent his...

Limited edition Womenz FruChocs released for International Women’s Day

5 March, 2020

5 March, 2020

MATT FREEMAN Menz Confectionery have released a special limited edition run of their much beloved FruChocs for International Women’s Day...

‘The Advertiser site really needs more autoplaying videos’, says idiot

7 February, 2019

7 February, 2019

Not content with the dozens of relentless display ads and ‘native’ articles masquerading as journalism, The Advertiser has employed idiot...

Casual Crows fan unsure if he’s supposed to love or hate Tex this week

3 June, 2019

3 June, 2019

With his form flip-flopping since the 2017 AFL Grand Final, Adelaide co-captain Taylor Walker has been the cause of much...

MP Jon Gee caught pwning CS:GO noobs in parliament

1 August, 2019

1 August, 2019

Just a few days after being busted playing Solitaire during budget estimates, it seems the brazen member for Taylor, MP Jon...

Guns N’ Roses actually pretty disappointed with Paradise city

24 July, 2019

24 July, 2019

During last year’s world tour, 80’s rock band Guns N’ Roses finally managed to make it to their ultimate destination,...

Empty Port Adelaide shed makes way for empty apartment building

18 April, 2019

18 April, 2019

The State Government has stepped into the ring in a fight over a historic shed in Port Adelaide, overruling a...

Comments

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: