31 May, 2020 South Australia's other fake news source

Single bloke on Kangaroo Island killing it on Tinder this week

What a week it has been for Steve Bachelor, 34, of Kangaroo Island.

‘It gets pretty hard dating in regional SA’, stated Steve ‘especially in your thirties, and when you’re unemployed, and still live with your parents, and nervously wet your pants at the sight of any attractive woman. But in the past few days, I’ve been doing pretty well for myself’.

As KI flooded with A-list swimsuit models for the Government-sponsored Sports Illustrated photo shoot, Steve, one of few single men on the Island, was getting messages throughout the day and night.

‘It gets pretty hard dating in regional SA, especially in your thirties, and when you’re unemployed, and still live with your parents, and nervously wet your pants at the sight of any attractive woman

‘I assumed they were all fake profiles at first, that’s happened to me before, you know? One time I matched with this brunette from Penneshaw, she was absolutely stunning in the photos, would have been the most beautiful woman on the island’.

‘We agreed to meet up’, Bachelor continues, ‘when I got to the café she was just this big sack of potatoes. Literally, like a hessian bag full of potatoes. I thought that it must be a scam of some sort, there’s no way that they’d let a bag of root vegetables open a Tinder account. But, you know, you’ve got to be open-minded about these things because we ended up having quite a nice date. Never called me back though…’

in Life, News
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